Page 126 of Hate To Love You

Ryker's breath is ragged, his eyes dark with a mix of emotions. I’ve seen him angry; I’ve seen him calm, but I don’t think I’ve ever seen him like this.

“You left,” he starts, and my eyes shoot to his. That’s the first thing he chooses to say to me? “You left, and you didn’t even give me the chance to explain,” he grits out.

“What was there to explain, Ryker?” I snap back as anger begins to surpass the anxiety I was feeling just moments ago.

“I could have told you the goddamn truth!” he yells, frustration clear in his features. I scoff, shaking my head. “Do you really believe I’d cheat on you?”

I stand my ground as Ryker takes a few steps in my direction. “Why shouldn’t I believe it? I knew I was never going to be enough for you. I was stupid to think you could want only me.” I turn around to head for the door because this isn’t going anywhere, but Ryker’s large hand grabs my wrist, pulling me back.

“You know, I've never had to beg or grovel, but I'll be damned if I let you walk away without hearing me out,’ he seethes before taking in a calming breath, his eyes softening just a touch. “I wouldn't do that to you, Gwen. You have to know that.”

I don’t know what to believe. I don’t know what to say. This whole situation has been a huge fucking shitshow and I hate Amy for putting these thoughts in my head. I was fine. We were fine.

“How could I know that? Before me, you were known for one-night stands and hookups. Why would I be any different?” I ask, my vision becoming blurry as tears threaten to spill. I bite the inside of my cheek to keep them from falling.

His eyes flash with rage, his hands clenching and unclenching at his sides. “That’s not fair. You can’t use my past against me. You know I’m not that same guy you ran into months ago,” he growls.

I cross my arms over my chest timidly. I know it’s not fair for me to bring up the past. I know he’s different now, but it’s hard to trust that he won’t miss that life one day.

“How do I know you won’t get tired of me?” I ask, my eyes welling with fresh tears.

“Because I fucking love you!” he yells frustratedly. “I knew you were different from all the other girls because you didn’t care about who I was or what I could do for you. You argued with me, you challenged me, you made me question everything I thought I knew, and I hated you for it. But it was never really hate,” he moves closer to me and I flinch slightly before his warm hand lands on my cheek.

His face softens and my pulse races. Ryker loves me?

“I've loved you since the moment you showed me you wouldn’t put up with my shit. And I can't stand the thought of you thinking I would ever do something to hurt you.”

Ryker's eyes blaze with a fierce intensity as he walks me back until I’m pushed up against the wall. His hand reaches above my head as he uses it to hold himself up while his other hand still rests on my cheek.

“You want an explanation? Fine. But you're going to listen, and you're going to believe me, Gwen.”

He knows I love it when he’s demanding, and I don’t want to be distracted right now. I’m still so confused and so hurt, but the way he’s looking at me right now has me forgetting what I was even mad about.

“Amy and I fucked, yes. But it was way before I even knew you. She’s been obsessed with me ever since, stalking me, and she must have seen us together. She lied to you, Gwen. I was with Pat at an Elite meeting the night before the party. I haven’t been with anyone else since I met you. I have not and will not ever betray your trust like that.”

He pushes his body flush against mine, and my breath hitches as I feel the rigid length of his arousal pressing against my stomach. Holy shit, I’ve missed that.

Amy lied. She was jealous and she lied to me to get me away from Ryker. I didn’t even give him the benefit of the doubt. I just believed her and left. Oh my God, I’m a horrible person. How does Ryker not hate me right now?

“She… lied?” I ask, my voice shaky as I hold back tears. Ryker caresses my cheek softly, his features gentle as he nods.

“Yes, Rebel. She lied,” he tells me, wiping away a tear that I hadn’t realized had fallen. “Shh. Why are you crying?”

I try to look down so he doesn’t see more tears spill out, but he holds my head in place, forcing me to look at him.

“Why are you crying, Gwen?” he asks again, this time more commanding.

“I’m just… I’m so sorry, Ryker,” I say, giving up on trying to hold my tears. They stream down my cheeks as Ryker’s face drops.

“What are you sorry for? You didn’t do anything,” he says.

“I left. I believed Amy and I left without giving you a chance to defend yourself. I hated you for weeks. I hated you because I thought you’d betrayed me. I hated that I loved you, even when I’d thought you’d cheated,” my voice shakes, and I try to take a deep breath. “I’m sorry.”

Ryker’s head tilts slightly as his brow furrows. He searches my face before tucking a piece of hair behind my ear.

“Loved?” he asks. My lips turn up into a small smile.

“Love,” I say, and a huge grin takes over Ryker’s hard features. “I love you, Ryker.”

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