Page 123 of Hate To Love You

She pulls back, leaving her hands on my shoulders as her eyes look over my face. I give her a small smile.

“Mom, I’ll be back in five months. And I’ll come visit,” I tell her. She tilts her head to the side and scoffs.

“That’s what you said last time.”

She’s not wrong. I did tell her before the Fall semester started that I’d come home every other weekend. But my classes got harder, and I had limited time to get things done, plus I didn’t feel like driving the two hours home.

“I promise I will.”

A knock on the door has us pulling away from one another before it flies open and Damian barges in. He’s gotten a haircut since the last time I saw him so his blonde hair is no longer hanging in his face. Instead, the sides are shaved down, and the top is a bit longer. He looks good.

“Oh, Gwenny! Your ride is here. Are you ready to get back to the big El?” he shouts. I roll my eyes.

“I’m driving you,” I deadpan as I grab my bags off the floor. I hear Sammy running down the hallway and he runs into Damian, almost knocking him over.

Since girls night, Sammy has fallen in love with Damian, and their relationship is actually pretty cute.

Damian leans down which gives Sammy the perfect opportunity to give him tons of kisses.

“I’m gonna miss you, buddy,” Damian says before he stands.

My mom chuckles before turning back to me.

“Call me if you need anything, sweetie,” mom squeezes my upper arms with a sad smile. I nod.

“I will, mom. Love you.”

“I love you, Gwenny,” she tells me as I walk to the front door, patting Sammy on the head before Damian and I head out.

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The drive back to campus wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be. Winter break went by a lot quicker than anticipated, but part of me is happy to be back on campus.

Although everywhere I look reminds me of green eyes, dark hair, and the sexiest smile I’ve ever seen. I still haven’t talked to him, even though I unblocked his number and have almost sent a hundred different texts before deciding against it and erasing the whole thing.

I’m being a coward. I know I should just reach out to him, but I can’t handle being hurt by him again. If he confirms everything Amy told me, I don’t think I’d survive.

But what if he tells me none of it was true? What if Amy was truly just a jealous bitch and told me they slept together to get me out of the picture? Would I take him back? Would he even want me back after I left him without an explanation and told him never to talk to me again?

What if I see him on campus, or on our way to classes? What if we have a class together? All the what ifs are driving me insane. I’ve been sitting in my room going through every single scenario possible and every one of them makes me question if I should just leave and go home. See if I can take the rest of my classes online or some shit.

But I’m not going to let him affect me that way. I’m going to suck it up, hold my head up high, and act like I’m not completely crushed by the only man I want.

I got an email from Professor Whitely this morning asking for me to come in to see her tomorrow morning before going to my first class. I’m not sure what she’d want me to come in for considering I’m not even her student anymore, but I can’t say I didn’t miss her. She’s the only professor on this campus that I’ve ever actually liked.

“Bitch?” I hear a voice call from the hallway. I wide grin spreads across my face as I jump off my bed, tossing my phone to the side to run out into the hall.

Lainey stands there, her red hair now a shade of dark purple, wearing a black mini skirt and a bright pink crop top with a huge smile on her face to match mine.

“Bitch!” I run to her with my arms open, smashing into her, and we hold onto each other for a few minutes, squealing with excitement as if we hadn’t seen each other at least five times during the break.

Lainey grabs a strand of her purple hair and twirls it around her finger. “Like the new hair?” she asks, batting her eyelashes flirtatiously. I reach up to run my fingers through it. The under part is darker than what’s on top, and it makes for a nice contrast. It looks great on her, and I think it fits her personality so much better than the red.

“I love it. It’s so you,” I say, and her smile grows. I look out into the living room, but I don’t see Ellie or Haley. “Where’s Haley and El?” I know they drove together, so she has to be here somewhere.

“Hal texted the group chat and said she’d be coming tomorrow. She doesn’t have classes tomorrow. And El is at the Elite mansion. Something about having to talk to Holland,” Lainey shrugs. My heartbeat picks up and my skin crawls at the mention of the mansion. Ryker is probably already back, and the reality of seeing him makes me nauseous.

Fuck, this sucks.

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