Page 10 of Mine to Worship

Missing her drains me, and even though my brother being here has given me some comfort, I need her.

Frustration rings in his voice and he tosses the phone on the couch. I should tell him I know where she is. It didn’t take long to confirm that she is indeed with her aunt.

I bite back a sardonic smile. I’m spending my honeymoon with my brother; she should see us getting along. She always wanted to fix our relationship. Ellia told me once that every relationship can be mended when both parties work at it and want it bad enough.

She was right. I wish I could have listened to her sooner. My brother and I are proof. With no more secrets and no more casting blame on each other, we’re opening up to a new kind of relationship.

Brandon wants to learn everything about the business, and mentoring him is taking my mind off the bleakness of Ellia’s absence. He soaks everything up, from my fighting lessons to my decisions about how I run the business. He analyzes everything down to the slightest detail. I found out that he’s quite ambitious, and he has the uncanny ability to charm people into doing what he wants as if it was their idea from the start. A trait that will make him a great right hand.

But her absence shadows everything, clouds everything, dims everything.

My need for her, the desire to see her tears me apart. My hands ache from the memory of holding her. I wish she never left or that she would come back, yell and scream at me. I would tell her everything and we could start over. Even in my head it sounds too much like a dream to be true.

What the fuck am I going to do if she doesn’t forgive me? I’ll grovel and grovel some more and tell her how I feel. I’ll do whatever it takes. I need to go and talk to her, ready to face my fucking mistakes. I have to get my woman back.

I don’t have it in me to let her go—ever. Marriage doesn’t work like that in the Reyes family. But if she lets me, I’ll prove to her I will do everything in my power not to let my fucking demons win.

Never again.

In the ring, we spar another round, Brandon’s legs bouncing from left to right. I take him down on the mat, and I don’t loosen my grip around his neck until he taps out.

“One day I’ll take you down,” he says while struggling to catch his breath.

I hear that all the time, but I’ll let him have his hope.

Back at my place, I take a shower. I’m drying myself when Walter calls, and I bite back a growl of irritation.

“How is Brandon doing?” he asks.

“He’s a fast learner. I’m putting him in charge for a while.”

“Isn’t it too soon? Are you sure he’s ready?”

“He’ll learn to be. Don’t question my methods, I have better things to do, like bring my wife home.”

I have to go after Ellia; I need my wife. I miss my angel and I crave my light back.

“Kian, you should—”

“I am not taking advice from you on this.”

My curt answer silences him. I am about to hang up when he says, “I am not getting any younger, son. I’m not asking for forgiveness I don’t deserve, but I’d rather you curse me out than your indifference. Don’t cut me out. Please, let me try to fix what I broke.”

I ball my hands at my sides, wishing I had never found out he is my father. I have no clue how to switch off years of hurt, deceit, and abuse at the hands of the man and woman who he entrusted me with. Instead of Walter acknowledging me as his son, he let my half-brother and his wife do a phenomenal job at fucking me up. He wants a chance… Well, he’s not getting it. I don’t fucking care that he didn’t know what I endured at the hands of his son. He should have taken responsibility for his actions. He fathered me. I don’t owe him shit.

“Don’t ask me for anything. You had your chance.”

I hang up. I’ve reached my daily quota of his emotional blackmailing bullshit.

I get dressed for the day, though I’m only halfway functioning. My head can’t focus on anything but thoughts of Ellia.

Brandon is at my desk when I enter, his eyes burrowing into the computer. I call his name twice and get no answer.

“Hmm?” he finally acknowledges me.

“I’m leaving you in charge while I’m gone.”

He shoots up, relief loosening his stiff shoulders. “You found her?”

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