Page 69 of One Day

I should be filled with pride. Anything but the dread that is currently pooling my stomach because she’s right. I have no reason to put it off anymore. I told her at the beginning of this semester that I wanted to wait for something concrete, a reason to stay before I corrected myself with my mom. And maybe a part of me was hoping it wouldn’t come so I could keep avoiding the truth and what my future would look like.

“I already told Mr. Richards I couldn’t accept.”

Her eyebrow lifts in surprise as she turns my computer back to me and pulls hers back over. “Oh, yeah? When did you do that?”

“After the interview. Sunny has a very convincing way of encouraging me to do things.”

She hums. “She told you she wouldn’t sleep with you again until you did it, didn’t she?”

“I’m not confirming or denying that.”

“You are so predictable!” She shakes her head just as my phone starts buzzing on the table, stealing my attention away and pumping my chest full of adrenaline when I see my mom’s picture on the screen. Flynn’s eyes dart towards the screen. “No time like the present. Maybe it’s time to rip off the Band-Aid.”

As much as I wish she wasn’t right, I know she is. There’s no more time for me to put it off. “I’ll be right back,” I say, standing from the table. She sends me a silent salute as I slide my thumb across the bottom of the screen, bringing it to my ear as I head outside for a bit more privacy. “Hi, Mama,” I answer, walking around the corner until I find a quiet spot.

“Peach! I just ran into Mr. Richards,” she says, and the knot in my stomach tightens. “He said you turned down the internship. He was keeping that spot open for you, Walker. I thought we talked about this? Why would you turn it down?”

Taking a deep breath, I push down the doubt growing in my chest. “I know he was keeping that spot open for me, but he doesn’t need an intern. He’s never needed an intern. He was doing it for you and for me, and while I appreciate everything he’s done for me over the last few years, I need something new. I need a challenge, and I got a great internship offer,” I share and swallow the lump in my throat. “Here.”

“What?”

“I have law school to think about, and I need to start padding my resume. A small-town law firm internship doesn’t look nearly as good as a big-city firm, a firm with actual cases and not local business disputes. And I know I should have told you from the start, I meant to and then I kept chickening out. I didn’t want to upset you.”

“But you agreed to the internship, Peach. You said you were coming home.”

“I know what I said…but I didn’t mean to.”

Her voice is weak, heartbreak written in her words as she says, “You…didn’t mean to?”

I squeeze my eyes shut and curl my fingers tighter around my phone. “Yes, I’ve been fighting with myself over this. It’s not like I’m going to spend the whole summer in Michigan. I will come home to see you, but my life is here now. I want something fresh, and I know that hurts you. That is the last thing I want, and I love you.”

“But you’re not coming home. Is this a forever thing?”

The question weighs my shoulders down. “I don’t know.”

“I don’t know what to say to that, and I have to go open the gallery. We can talk later,” she says, and it feels like she just stomped the heel of her boot against my chest. She’s shutting down, putting the cage around her to protect herself from hurting, but it’s never been from me. I’ve always been in the cage, and right now, I’m standing outside it, looking inside through the crack of her exterior.

“Mama, we need to talk about this.”

“I’ll talk to you later, Peach.”

The line goes dead before I can argue with her further, needing her to hear me out and for us to be okay. I’ve never felt like I’m the one on rocky terrain with her. It is new ground for us to navigate, and truthfully, I’m not sure I know what to do with it.

She’s been my person my entire life. My best friend for most of it, and I’ve never felt the distance I feel right now between us. She’s pushing me away to protect herself, and I can’t blame her because it’s what I’ve been doing. I’ve spent the last few weeks shoving as much distance between us as possible and distracting myself with Sonya and sex.

“Oh no,” Flynn says the moment I step up to the table and reach for my bag, shutting my laptop without returning to my seat. “Walker, what happened?”

“Doesn’t matter.” I slide my laptop into the bag, collecting my notebook from the side to put with it. “I’m going to head home, okay? I’ll see you later.”

“Walker.” She grabs my wrist, keeping me from running off. “What did she say?”

I shake my head. “Doesn’t matter,” I repeat myself. “It’s done. She knows. That’s all, and now I’m going to go home.”

Her grip loosens on my wrist before it’s gone altogether, letting me brush her off and leave without another word. The grip on my heart tightens with every step I take, putting more space between me and everything else before it hooks on and drags me under.

“Walker!” Sonya calls from the other side of my apartment door, knocking for what feels like the millionth time. “Cowboy, I know you’re in there, and you can hear me. Come and open this door. Or I’m going to eat this whole pie by myself.”

Getting up from the couch, I approach the door and pull it open. “It’s not fair to bribe me with pie. I can’t say no to pie,” I tell her, leaning into the edge of the door to find her in my hallway. Her lips pull up at the corners, gracing me with a little bit of her sunshine in my gloom.

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