Page 78 of Crazy for this Girl

It's going to be a while, Laynee.

Don't wait around for me if someone else comes by that cares so deeply for you that he can't breathe.

I love you more than you'll ever fucking know. Please don't forget it, or me.

Love, Cal.

AKA Always Yours.

EIGHT MONTHS LATER…

"You ready to go, babe?" Blowing away the piece of hair that keeps falling to my face, I look around the bed to make sure I've packed everything I need for my trip to Switzerland. A bunch of extra clothes lie there, mocking me that I may or may not need them while my suitcase pleads that it can't hold anymore.

"One minute," I call back, forcing myself to zip up the rest of my tattered black luggage and be done with my five-day ordeal of packing, unpacking, and making multiple lists of everything I need.

It's been eight months of planning, researching, and obsessing over this mini-trip that has made it more stressful than anything and I'm hoping it pays off.

It needs to pay off.

I've been wanting to go for years and now that it's winter break, and I have two weeks of freedom, I'm finally doing it.

"Babe." I glimpse over my shoulder, finding Troy leaned up against the door frame of my bedroom. His lean body angles as well as his head, watching me fixate on what I need. His brown eyes glimmer in amusement of how nuts I am. "Please don't tell me you're thinking about it again."

"About what again?" I ask innocently, knowing exactly what he's referring to, which is my mindless plaguing over this trip.

He crosses his arms over his chest, his tall body waiting for me to deny my overly obsessed state of this trip going perfectly.

I need something to.

"Re-packing. You've done it twice already." I scoff haughtily at him, even though he's not wrong. I'm surprised he hasn't thrown in the towel and told me to go by myself.

At this point, I kinda want to.

I feel as though I'm betraying a memory that hasn't left my head for months. One with dark brown hair, a body of a muscled god, and a promise that was broken by the next morning.

"We're gonna be late for our flight if you don't move that pretty butt of yours," Troy jeers, pushing off the wall and striding toward me. He never swears, and for some reason, I always notice it.

Because it’s not Cal.

Troy is the exact opposite. Never speaking out of turn or making snide little comments that might rile me up a bit. His light brown hair contrasts against Cal’s dark, and the first time Troy and I had sex; I felt guilty about it for weeks. My brain and heart can’t get on the same page here, and it’s exhausting.

A strong arm around wraps around my middle, and I’m pulled back into the here and now. Not where I want to be.

But that's my motto these days. No going back and thinking about what could've been, reading between the lines, or trying to figure out what or why Cal left me in an abandoned hotel room with all his shit gone. The least he could've done is say goodbye to me or told me the sex sucked or that he would miss me.

Instead, I got a love letter that told me to move on.

How fucked up is that?

Since then, I've studied my ass off for prerequisites for classes I didn't care about. It was like starting high school all over again, but this time I had to pay for everything, and the teachers could care less if you passed or not. I still mindlessly walk through college like I have a clue about what I’m doing.

I don’t.

"I'm coming," I vouch off a sigh, shoving back my rebellious thoughts that never want to leave me be. "I just need to grab my purse."

He gently kisses the top of my head and gives me a little squeeze, smelling of musk and citrus. "I'll be downstairs answering more questions from your mom about if I'm going to be a millionaire or not."

I groan because bless his soul. He never truly complains much about Mom’s stupid ways, and I owe him more than half-ass being involved in this relationship that I do want to have work. "Troy, go wait in the car. No need to succumb to that woman."

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