Page 188 of Crazy for this Girl

“I want pictures.”

“Okay.”

“And I need to search your apartment for other weapons.”

I quirk a brow. “How many do you think I have?”

“Do you own butter knives?”

“I do.” Running a hand down the side of my face, I erase the persistence that this woman has for my safety by attempting not to show how much I like that she cares for me. If I do, she might retreat or back off. “However, those might take too long and I’m not that dedicated to the cause of offing myself when you’re sitting in front of me in that tight-ass black dress.”

“Cal, promise me something, please.”

“How can I turn you down when you say please to me, baby?”

“If you feel like you…” She inhales and slowly releases it. “I’m scared.”

My heart cracks at her admission and I try my best to soothe it away. Because the last thing I ever want her to do is to be fearful for me. “I love you, Laynee. I’m never leaving you. Not even God himself could keep me from you.”

“God is a woman, Harper. And I need a full-blown, my life depends on it sort of pact.”

“I’d never bet your life, so I promise.”

She bobs her head, then tucks it into her chest for a moment. “And if you ever fall out of feelings for me—”

“It’ll never happen.”

“But if it does”—She peels her face from her body and cuts into me with those relentless blues—“I’m never leaving your side. You might have to get a restraining order on me, but I’m never allowing you to go back there.”

“I might just get one because it sounds like it could get kinky, and I’m all down for you forcing yourself on me, Miss Reese.”

She throws a pen at me, and I let it hit me to make her feel better. “Kinky or not, I’m never going to permit you to get into that headspace. And if you do, I’m going to get you out.”

All you have to do is get naked.

But, of course, I don’t say that. She’s being serious and I want to stop talking about my thoughts of suicide when all I crave to focus on is our future.

“I understand,” I emit seriously.

“I wish you would’ve come to me.”

“I know, but you were dating someone. Probably the Duke prick or something.”

“Then you really should’ve come for me,” she claims with a bit of teasing in her tone. “Would’ve saved my time.”

“Too much of that had gone by. Our conversations were dwindling; you had your own life, and I had a mess. I never would’ve put my burdens on you when all you knew was that I disappeared and kept you out.” I clutch my hands together underneath the table. “I’m sorry, Laynee. You have no idea how much I wish I could’ve done something to prevent all this. You don’t know how much I wanted to be with you.”

“I know that.”

“I love you, Laynee. I always have.” She scrutinizes me with so much intensity that I’m afraid she’s going to hurt her eyes. “What part of that don’t you believe?”

“I believe all of it. It’s just that…you haven’t told me how bad it still is.”

“Lately, with you back around, you seem to soak in my every thought. I haven’t had an episode for a while. You’ve been the only thing I’ve ever truly wanted. So, tell me your price, Laynee.” I rise from my chair and walk over to hers, turning her chair to get on my knees between her legs.

“What are—”

“What do you need me to do?”

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