Page 108 of Deceit

That she knows of anyway. There have been a few that I wasn’t appointed to that I’ve watched her do from afar. Sometimes we’re assigned solo missions, quick assassinations that don’t take but one perfect moment and a bullet of your choice.

I don’t like the odds. So, I watch my wife while she works. I didn’t sign up to be a widow.

Call it clingy, weird, odd, or fucking stupid, but I never claimed to be smart.

“You’re all set,” Emmy continues through my irritation. “Mission accomplished.”

“Don’t do that shit again,” I growl out, still thinking about her ass on his lap. “I mean it, Em.”

“Why?” Her face twists in confusion, then realization. “Oh…you mean like a little whore.”

A mirthless chuckle rumbles in my chest, and I turn my hands into fists again to keep from touching her because it won’t be to scare her.

I itch to rip her fucking dress to shreds.

I want my teeth sinking into her thighs to remind her to keep her damn bodyawayfrom anyone who isn’t me. Especially on a fucking mission.

“You’re far from that, Emmy,” I remark.

“But that’s what you’re into, right?”

“I don’t know, am I?” I cock my head to the side because I’d love to identify what she believes I’m into.

What makes my dick hard and ready.

And if she doesn’t notice that it’s her yet, I’m not sure how else to spell it out.

“I don’t know what you want anymore. Camilla fucked you up so bad you can’t see straight.”

“It’s none of your fucking business,” I emit through a clenched jaw. “But when it is, you’ll be the first I tell.”

“Your phone buzzed last night when you were sleeping.”

I stare at her, and when she does continue, I shrug. “Okay…”

“It kept going off and off and woke me. I finally checked it to make sure Scarlett or your brother didn’t need you. It was your security system at the house. Camilla was there again, outside on your front porch.” Geezus fucking Christ. She inhales a deep breath, and her nostrils flare. I know that look. She’s about to break. “I just want you to be straight with me. If you…If you want to give her another chance, Bish, just let me know. I’ll sign—”

“I honestly have no fucking idea why she was there, nor do I care,” I sneer through a blurring tunnel of self-preservation, remorse, and memories. “I’m tired of talking about this.”

“I want to hear you say it.” She wipes out the only air I have solo and impedes it. Demanding for me to open up about my past. “I want to hear you state that whatever you feel for her doesn’t fuck us up.”

“She didn’t screw us up, Ems,” I leer slowly and guardedly. “You did. I may have been slow with opening up, but you slammed that door in my face when you freaked out about us getting married, and I let you have that. Then months went on, I wanted to tell the boys that I had a beautiful wife and it was you. I was ready. I was scared fucking shitless, but eventually…crush or not, Emmy, it would’ve evolved if it hasn’t already.”

“Evolve into what? You never even asked me on a date. You never—”

“What are we fucking sixteen?”

She scoffs at me. “No, I’m a woman that likes to feel like you wanted to put in the effort.”

“I’m done talking about this.” I wave a dismissive hand in the air. “This is a long road that leads to nowhere. Camilla doesn’t mean shit to me. So keep convincing yourself that I’m all to blame.”

“I’m not, but—“

“You are. Man the hell up.”

She sniffs through her nose. “Fuck it then. Yes, I messed us up too, but even afterward, you still stayed closed off and shut down.”

“And you still kept me a dirty, dark secret that you allowed to fuck you.”

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