Page 198 of Overcast

Stretchingalong the soft sheets of the bed, I crack my eyes open to find Marty isn’t next to me.

Shocker.

I wonder if the man ever sleeps or if he’s a vampire. The soft closing of a car door sounds outside, hinting that Marty got me some of those bagels and donuts that I wanted from the small store we went to yesterday. The smell of coffee fills my nose, and I can’t help the splinter of my lips when I think about where I am compared to weeks ago.

How much my life has turned upside down for the better, and I have more than anything I could’ve asked for.

Marty has done nothing but try and keep me happy, it’s time I learn and explore things that could make his life simpler or happier.

Besides the sex, of course, which seems to be the only thing he wants.

We made love one more time before falling asleep, our legs tangled together, and his large forearm draped over my torso. His chin rested upon the top of my head, and he whispered how he wished he could live here.

I would’ve told him that Mills and Bishop weren’t that bad, but sleep won over, and now I’m here the next morning wondering what things we could do today. That maybe we could talk about the important things that I know wedge in between us that we’re afraid to ask.

Sitting up and swinging my legs over the side, I plop down on the floor and stride out into the hall.

The kitchen opens up, bright and beautiful from the morning’s rays, and I glance out the large window overlooking the driveway. A red flatbed pulls off the gravel drive, leaving behind a black Chevy Malibu in its wake. Stepping closer, I search for Marty’s truck, not finding it there, and pivot back for coffee.

And there, on the kitchen island, sits my bagels, donuts, some red roses, and a folded up piece of paper. Plucking the white parchment up first, I quickly open it, skimming over unrecognized handwriting, but it’s my name at the top left that shows it’s for me.

Stormi—

You are the best thing that has ever happened to me. I don’t know what I did to deserve you for the time that we had, but I won’t ask questions. I’m a lucky fuck who was able to hold you, kiss you, and make you mine for the allotted time we had even though it’d never be forever.

When you read this letter, it’ll begin to sink in that I’m not there. I took the pussy route for the first time in my life because seeing you cry isn’t something I’m equipped to handle. I never wanted it to happen this way. I never wanted you to mean anything to me. You started off as my enemy, and I sometimes wish you would’ve stayed that way because the alternative is worse.

Since day one, I’ve had a strong and unyielding fascination with you. I’ve tried to fight it, file you away as a no one. But nothing could ever put you anywhere but at the forefront of my brain. You had me in the palm of your hand, and I’d gladly stay there just to be within touching distance of you.

This home is yours, paid for, and in your name. On the microwave is information of a bank account with money in it, keys to your new car outside—I had to pick black to keep something of me with you—and identification.

Your new life starts now.

I promised that I’d give you everything you wanted after the shit I’ve done to you, and this is me keeping it.

Getting here was always the plan, and as much as I don’t want to part from you, this is for the best no matter how you look at it. I might be someone that makes you happy now, but I’ll make you miserable in the long run. You can’t ignore who I am and what I do forever, and I’ll only drag you down when you need to shine.

And I don’t want you to dim out.

I want you to build the life you always wanted and never had. I want you to fall in love with some asshole, get a dog, and have kids. I can’t be selfish with you. As much as it makes me sick to give you up to the world, mine isn’t yours to live in. It’s too desolate and cruel, filled with events and demons that have no reason to lie on your doorstep.

With all that bullshit aside, I want you to know that you are the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen. Being with you has been the highlight of my life, and nothing will ever compare to the time we spent together.

I’ll never fucking forget you.

There won’t be a day that goes by where I won’t think about you.

You’re fucking everything.

Last night, you told me you loved me, you crazy and dumb woman. I swear to God I always knew you’d be the death of me, and I’m serving the perfect sentence for all the offenses I’ve committed. You were my revelation to care again, to breathe clearly.

And I’m in love with you too.

I have been for a long time. And in the most douchebag fashion, I’m telling you this in a note after leaving you behind, but you need to know that it was never just you. And it’ll remain like that until the day I die.

Make me proud and take care of yourself.

I forgot to mention that the blade you stabbed me with, along with a gun, is in one of the drawers in your room.

I love you, sweetheart.

Always and fucking forever.

— Marty.

---