Page 36 of Bona Fide

"Why don't you spill," Andy states, handing over a lit blunt.

Glancing around, we're standing off a quiet street where no one is outside due to the chilly weather, but I motion for him to walk down the sidewalk more so the smell of weed doesn't get the cops called on us.

"I'm just stressed out," I reply when we get further down. "Mama's done with chemo, but I'm scared of what comes next. Her bills get delivered to me, so she thinks Marty's insurance pays for it all."

“Doesn’t it pay for it all?”

I shake my head. “No.” I take a hit on the joint, letting the start of its effects seep into my body.

“How did Marty get your mom on his health insurance? I thought it was for immediate family members and spouses.”

"Something about her being a dependent, but the specialty care isn't covered."

"So, you've been covering the chemo?" I nod again, taking one more hit before handing the joint back over. "That's...expensive as hell."

“It’s why I’m in this world.”

“Rea...that world is shit.”

“But it keeps Mama getting what she needs.”

“And Marty still sends money?”

"Yeah, he got an increase about a year back. Mama thinks the house is paid for under government assistance, but it's not. He pays for the mortgage, a small amount of the bills."

“And you pay for the rest.”

“Yep. While he risks his life doing God knows what,” I allude, bowing my head into my chest.

I inhale a deep breath. Here I am living a free life while bitching and complaining about it. My older brother is seeing fuck knows what, and it eats at me. I want him just to come home. He can build whatever he wants with his life as long as he's out of jeopardy. It's all I care about.

“You always said he was a smart dude,” Andy says, passing back the weed. “Don’t sweat it so much. He’ll be home soon.”

“Sometimes—” I take a hit. “—I’m not so sure. It’s been years since I’ve seen him.”

“And what else?”

I glance up at him. “What else what?”

"Marty has always been a worry for you. What happens is when something starts to bother you, you reflect on everything else. So keep your vague ‘nothings’ out of this conversation, and let's have it out."

Narrowing my brows, I exhale my intake. “You keep a secret like shit.”

“Not when it comes to you.”

I scoff. “Sure.” Andy takes the blunt from my hands and brings it to his lips, keeping his immediate scowl on me.

“Try me.”

“I slept with the fucking governor.” Andy immediately begins to choke off his inhale, hitting his chest repeatedly to clear it up. “How’s that, asshole?”

"You're an idiot," he chides, still trying to gain back his regular breathing.

“Didn’t know he was married.” Andy shakes his head and holds up a finger for me to hold on while he gains his composure.

Rolling my eyes, I pull my phone from my jeans’ pocket and close out Wade’s text.

I want to delete and block it.

---