Page 162 of Catfish

Me: Don’t work too hard.

Me: And text me later.

Chase: Didn’t you just ask me why I’m bothering you earlier?

Me: You know I didn’t mean it.

Me: *smiley face with hearts in eyes*

Chase: You’re annoying.

Me: But you like it.

Another episode of the Housewives of Hell and I'm still stir crazy in my hotel room. Emmy had some conference calls this evening to get to, and Wade took off for drinks or dinner with the other delegates, so I was stuck with entertaining myself.

So I act like a child and text Emmy.

Me: Hiiii!!!

Emmy: You’re bored, aren’t you?

Me: Yep!

Emmy: Ugh, I'm sorry, girl, two more conference calls.

Emmy: And Wade just added another one. (Fuck my life.)

Me: Ew, shouldn’t he be kissing ass or something?

Emmy: LOL! You’re seriously horrible.

Emmy: He’s back already, I guess. Already dropped some stuff off for me to do. He knows how to have zero fun, I swear.

Me: I don’t think he plays well with others.

Emmy: Which concerns me.

Emmy: If he doesn’t lighten up, he’s not going to win this.

Me: He was great on the panel.

Me: Do NOT tell him I said that.

Emmy: I think he already knows he did well. (Like he needs a bigger head.)

Emmy: But unless his name shows up on something else other than “who is Wade Lockwood,” he’s going to lose to that old guy with the toupee.

Me: Ew, what?!

Me: You know half of America was making fun of him like we were in the crowd.

Emmy: Honestly, don't know what you're talking about. *winky face*

Emmy: But he’s everywhere—local news, charity events, going around the country to small towns. His PR team is made up of a bunch of damn geniuses.

Me: Where’s Wade’s PR team?

Me: We just need him to save a puppy from a bus or something, and he'll win the thing.

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