Page 111 of Catfish

“Aren’t we?” Jed asks, eyes filled with hope.

How the fuck could I say no even though I don’t deserve it?

“Anything you want,” I tell him. “Absolutely.”

He hands me back the Cuban. “That’s what I want.”

Taking the cheroot, I’m careful not to touch him. Not to be a chaotic mess that just stormed back into his life.

“How’d you meet her?”

"Through Mom. Belle is beautiful, smart, graduated from Berkley, and loves tennis. She's a catch. "

I kick imaginary rocks off the sidewalk. “She sounds great.”

“I don’t know.”

“Just cold feet,” I tell him. “That’s normal.”

“I don’t think it’s normal when you’ve never told your soon-to-be wife that you love her.”

I don’t stop the cigar from hitting my lips because I need something to do. I need to choke myself into a wheeze again or continue puffing on my next hit of poison because the next words wanting to fly out of my mouth aren’t for me to say.

“How do you know?” he asks me. “That you’re not making a mistake.”

I blow out my exhale of smoke and hand it back to him. “You just know.”

Lamest line ever because I have no damn clue.

Averting my focus from him, I watch a valet run out into the parking lot to probably grab a car. That’s exactly what I want to do right now, leave. I’m not one for advice other than keeping your guard up and watching your damn back.

“Did you ever...did you ever think that being with Grant was a mistake?”

“Miss Shelton.” Immediately, my body tenses as if I got caught stealing money out of someone’s purse.

Son of a bitch.

The lack of time I was given to respond to Jed, along with the soft clacking of his shoes, makes me crave that blunt I was thinking about earlier.

Jed and I are on the side of the building, far away from the entrance, so we can have some damn peace and quiet. So how Lockwood found me—he would’ve had to come all the way out of the building to see us. Past the bushes lining the building and in this direction.

And while I’m on edge with his question, Jed looks unaffected, curious if anything, as I slowly turn to face my new boss.

“Governor,” I say through clenched teeth, watching every step he takes. “Leaving so soon?” He levels me with a blank stare before tearing it away to get a look at the man behind me.

“Not quite yet.” His eyes soak me in from head to toe before extending his hand to Jed. “Governor Lockwood.”

“Jed Hardison, it’s a pleasure to meet you.” I can’t see Wade’s face, because he’s already walked past me and to Jed, blocking him, so he could be in the middle of a death stare right now for all I know. But Lockwood steps away and looks back at me.

“Enjoying the night air?”

"Something like that." Wade perks a brow at my vague answer, which is humorous because that's all he feeds me.

“She choked on her drink,” Jed informs him. “I took her out here to grab some fresh night—”

“That was nice of you,” Wade cuts in, still locked on me. “Are you feeling better?”

“I’m fine.”

---