Page 22 of Ruthless Intent

“There was someone at the cemetery this morning.” I avoid saying Zain’s name. I want to ask my question before I tell her who put it in my head.

She pauses on her way to the sink, and turns to look at me. “Oh?” There’s an odd inflection to her voice.

“Oh? Why are you saying it like that?”

“It’s Sunday. I know that Marissa goes there on Sunday’s.”

Marissa. Jason’s mom.

“She wasn’t there.”

She nods, and turns back to the sink, picking up the dish cloth. “So, what did you want to ask me?”

“When did you and Dad start dating?”

She gives a little laugh. “Honey, you know that story already. About two years before you were born. He came into the gas station where I was working, and left his wallet behind.”

“Was that before or after he divorced Marissa?” I watch her carefully, looking for anything that will hint toward Zain telling the truth.

If I hadn’t been looking for it, I wouldn’t have noticed the way her shoulders stiffen.

“Mom?”

“Why are you bringing this up now?”

“I saw Zain at the cemetery.”

The plate she’s washing drops into the sink, and she whirls around.

“What did you do, Ashley? The man was exonerated. They released him. It’s all over the news how he was falsely accused. The last thing you need right now is people focusing on you.”

I know why she’s assuming I did or said something. I have an inability to keep my mouth shut sometimes, so I’m not offended by her demand. A little hurt, maybe, but not offended.

“I didn’t do anything. He spoke to me. He said some … some things.”

She dries her hands and drops the cloth on the countertop, then joins me at the table. “What kind of things? I’m sure he’s angry, but you were just a child.”

“He said that you had an affair with Dad, then threatened to tell his wife unless he agreed to leave her and stay with you.”

Shock flashes across her face, but she recovers fast. “How ridiculous. He’s just lashing out.”

“Is he? Or is he right? Did you break up their marriage?”

“Their marriage was already over by the time I met him.”

“Was it? Or is that just what you tell yourself?” I jump to my feet. “All these years, I thought your marriage was this beautiful second chance. That after his divorce, he found you. But you caused the divorce in the first place. Is that the real reason Jason didn’t spend much time here?”

“Ashley, it was so long ago. What does it matter now?”

“Of course it matters!”

“Alright, fine. Yes, we did have an affair.” Exasperation is clear in her tone. “But I didn’t know he was married, Ashley. That’s the truth. Not until I got pregnant with you. And by then I was in love with him. He admitted he was married. I wasn’t from Whitstone, and didn’t live here. I saw your father during the week. He worked in the city, but came home on the weekends. I didn’t know it was because he had a wife and son here. And I certainly didn’t move here until after he divorced Marissa.

“When I found out I was pregnant, I thought he’d be happy. But he wasn’t. He admitted that he was married, and had a young son.” Her eyes meet mine. “While I was reeling from the shock of that, he left me and went back to her. I didn’t see him during the entire pregnancy, then the night you were born I sent him a message, telling him you were here. He turned up at the hospital. He wanted to see you. So yes, I did give him an ultimatum, and yes I did threaten to tell his wife. But, I swear to you, if he’d chosen Marissa, I wouldn’t have told her. It was a moment of weakness, of anger. I was upset, angry, and scared. But I had to look out for myself and the baby I’d just given birth to. I will not be blamed for that.”

There’s a lump in my throat. I’m not sure if I should be upset or angry. Do I have any right to be?

“Did Jason hate me?” The words come out as a whisper.

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