Page 190 of Dare To Live

I perch on the bench beside him. “What happened to Zoey was not your fault. Evan is the only one to blame. He’s the one who killed her.”

“I didn’t want to do any of the pranks on her, but there was so much pressure. When I said no to doing them to you, everyone got angry with me. I would have warned you what they planned, but they stopped telling me anything. I had no clue what they were planning until it happened.” His voice cracks.

I run my hand up his spine, trying to comfort him. “You were a kid. We all were. I didn’t even consider that you might have been part of the group who tormented her. She never mentioned you in her diary.”

“I didn’t want to tell you because I thought you would hate me if you found out. If you knew I was one of them.” His words come out in a sob.

“I could never hate you.” I pull him into my arms, holding him while he cries. “You’re not like them. I know that. You didn’t enjoy hurting someone because you’re a good person.”

“Then why did Evan pick me?” His voice is raw.

“I don’t know.”

“He must have seen something bad in me.”

“There isn’t a bad bone in your body. Don’t think like that. You’re nothing like those bitches back there.”

Everything spills out of him, jagged and painful, all the guilt and fear. I stroke his back and his hair, whispering to him and trying to calm him. I hug him while he weeps.

This fucking place has been bad for so many of us. I wish I could take away his hurt, but maybe Ivan is right and coming here to confront everything we went through will be cathartic enough to let him heal … to let everyone heal.

When his sobs die down to sniffles, I offer him a clean tissue from my pocket.

“Where’s Ivan?”

Miles dries his eyes. “In our room, taking a business call. He’s been acting weird since last night.”

“What do you mean?”

“Distracted, quiet.”

“Maybe he’s just processing everything we talked about last night. It has to be fucked up to someone who wasn’t part of what happened.”

“I guess.”

I wrap my arm around his shoulder again and hug him tightly. “He loves you very much.”

“I know.” His smile seems forced. “I’m lucky to have him.”

“I’m kind of glad he talked us into coming this week. There were so many questions left that needed answers.”

“Have you noticed that none of us are married? Apart from Brad and Lacy.” His voice is quiet. “The rest of us don’t seem to have settled down. No kids. It makes me wonder if that’s because we were tainted by Evan. What he did. What he manipulated us into doing.”

“I don’t think so. It just made us more wary. It’s hard to trust when you’re always looking for ulterior motives.” My thoughts go to Eli, and how he’s been absent all day long. “But look at you. You’re happy with Ivan. You’re engaged. Maybe it’s time to plan the wedding.”

That draws a smile out of him. “Maybe.”

“What are you wearing to the prom tonight? Maybe you could pretend it’s a practice run.”

Miles twists one end of the tissue around between his fingers and laughs quietly. “I have a blue Armani suit.”

“Want to help me with my makeup later?”

He nods. “I can do that. Are you putting your hair up?”

“Yes.”

“I can’t wait to see you in that dress.”

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