Page 52 of Just Between Us

That evening, I called my grandmother and told her I was moving to New York.

***

It’s Saturday and Levi left a few days ago for Shanghai for work. As a result, I’m forced to hang out with Kez who is sitting across from me with designer sunglasses that are way too large for her face. Never mind the rain outside.

“So, are you going to tell me what last week Saturday was about?” she asks as she moves back the sunglasses until they are at the top of her head.

I lift an eyebrow, feigning innocence. “What are you talking about?”

Kez rolls her eyes. “Oh, c’mon, Cole, I’m not stupid,” she says. “You and Levi are fucking Kai, aren’t you?”

Not that it’s secret, and I’d never hide anything from her but hearing it out loud from someone else is strange. For the last seven weeks, Kai, Levi and I have existed in a bubble of intense sex, Harry Potter marathons and books. I’ve been having the best time.

I cock my head to the side. “What makes you think that?”

Kez gives me a blank stare and I laugh. We have been my best friend since I was eight. She’s probably my only real friend. The only person outside my grandparents who knows who I truly am and doesn’t care.

Her father worked with my father before he was involved in a fatal car crash. The first time we met, she’d given me one look and declared us best friends forever, enveloping me in a tight hug. I was seven and it was the first time anyone had hugged me since the Socks incident.

It made me feel strange and I tried to avoid her for the rest of the afternoon, but she wouldn’t leave me alone. She started showing up at our house every weekend, convincing her parents that since we were best friends, we needed more play dates.

She wore me down and at some point, during that year, she went from being an outright nuisance, to mildly tolerable and then eventually my best friend. After I moved to New York, she would visit during half-term and Christmas breaks. For a long time, she was all I had.

“Shit,” Kez says, eyes wide. “You are sleeping with him. I mean when I saw you making out on the dancefloor, and then disappearing to the bathroom, I figured something was definitely going on but hearing you admit it is…” she trails, shaking her head.

“You’re judging,” I say.

Her eyes widen and she shakes her head. “No! No! How could I judge? Kai is stunning. I’m just surprised, that’s all.”

I lift an eyebrow because I know she wants to say more.

She rolls her eyes as if something is obvious and I’m missing the point. “Have you met yourself?” she asks. “The moment anyone so much as lands their eyes on Levi, you look at them like you’re going to murder them. I guess I’m just surprised you let Kai anywhere near him or you for that matter.”

She’s right.

Before Kai, the idea of anyone else having Levi made me sick but there was something about him from the moment he walked into Levi’s office that afternoon. I was intrigued, even though I was willing to ignore it. But then, Levi felt the same and it has all snowballed into this–fucking in a club bathroom and having the best orgasm of my life.

“So, do you like him?” Kez asks.

“I wouldn’t be sleeping with him if I didn’t,” I point out. I know that’s not what she means but I don’t know how to answer the question.

Do I like Kai?

I like how his eyes light up when I give him a new book. I like how gentle he is although I’m sure he’s lived a life that does not promote gentleness at all. I like how well he fits between Levi and I. But I know I shouldn’t. Liking him past sex is a terrible idea.

“You aren’t funny,” Kez mutters, biting into her raspberry tart. She chews for a second. “But are you sure this is a good idea?It’s fun now but I’ve seen enough movies and read enough books to know that it could get complicated.”

“Then we stop.”

It sounds easy but I don’t like the idea of stopping. I’ve grown greedy.

Kez narrows her eyes. “You’re being weirdly naïve about this. It’s unlike you. Where is the objective, pragmatic Cole we all know and kind of like?”

Kez is right. This is so far from something I would do. Kai is an abnormality that should make me uncomfortable. I’ve always worked in patterns and logic. I’ve always known who I am. Kai fits into none of my patterns. Doctor Phillipe would have a field day with this one.

“I’m trying not to think about it.”

She loses her smile. “I’ve known you for most of my life, Cole. I’ve been there for all of your unconventional explorations–the BDSM club was particularly fun–but there’s something different about this. You seem different.”

---