Page 67 of Bastian

Loving Ella is easy.

Effortless and pure.

All that is good in me, or that’s left.

I watch in awe as Ella engages in conversation with both Shaw and Benjamin like she’s part of them. Like she’s a grown-up, and in some ways, she is. She’s too bright and wiser than her six years, that is for sure. She’s always been an old soul. One I love endlessly.

“Are you not hungry? Should I ask the cook to make you something else?” Sebastian whispers next to me, causing goosebumps to scatter down my neck and spine. I curse him under my breath.

Giving him a droll look, making sure Ella doesn’t pick up on my mood. “What she chose is perfect.”

“Good.” He picks up his utensils and starts to eat his pizza like a proper asshole.

Scoffing, I suppress the urge to roll my eyes.

His fork stops midair. “What is it?” He narrows his eyes.

That’s much better. I could always handle petty as hell Sebastian while his softer side always unnerved me and made me feel as if I were in strange waters. Out of my comfort zone. How sad is that I am used to asshole behavior and so out of touch with how we all deserve to be treated.

Kindness.

Respect.

Love.

It will always feel strange to me, I guess.

“Only you would eat pizza with a fork and knife. Would it kill you to be normal?”

“It just might.” He resumes eating his pizza, ignoring my critique. It’s petty, I know. Most people eat their pizza with a knife and a fork. Hell, I do that too, but the childish part of me wanted, no, need to point out how absurd he looks surrounded by two beasts of tattooed men and a six-year-old while they pig out on junk food.

I take a bite of my pizza, trying to hold back the moan of pleasure that tries to slip out when the delicious taste hits my tastebuds. I haven’t had a pizza in three years. I did try once. Benjamin brought me a box from one of our favorite pizza places, but I broke down crying like a fool, so I’ve been going without it ever since.

Until now.

“It’s good, mommy?” Ella asks while tilting her head in a knowing smile.

Oh, you’re a traitor, my little love. I think to myself while smiling back at her. If I didn’t love you so damn much, I would kick your little know-it-all behind.

“It’s delicious,” I replied.

My girl smiles and then continues eating her sweets while the young man next to her, Shaw, takes huge bites of his fried chicken after dipping it in three different sauces and then licking his fingers like an animal.

Cringing, I avert my eyes before I vomit my food. No manners whatsoever. I don’t even bother looking at Benjamin since I know he eats like a damn pig, too.

I guess it runs in the family.

I love him, but he tests my patience daily.

I continue eating my pizza being careful not to spill anything on myself and staying quiet, listening to Benjamin, Shaw, and Ellaiza talk about everything and nothing at the same time.

The air is sweet here.

Not hostile.

Not bitter.

It was always this way back then, too.

---