Page 65 of The Secrets of a Sin

“You wanted me to take you to my room, and I did.” He voices above me, creating a thick atmospheric change that causes my lungs to seize. “Now, you can either talk to me.” He digs his kneecaps further into mine, making my head rise in obedience. As I do, I realize my face is in direct line with his crotch and the solid outline of his cock. Even fully clothed from the waist down, you could see that he was big. Long and impossibly hard under the constraint of his pants. I swallow the large lump in my throat. “Or I can put your mouth to work in other ways. Your choice, angel.”

Shivers stream down my body, and my mouth becomes uncomfortably dry. I swirl my tongue around inside, hoping to alleviate the awkward sensation, but I suddenly realize that my tongue isn’t the antidote. I was craving something far more sinister in my mouth. Something that only Arsen could give me.

My eyes clash with his, but not before scaling up his trim abdomen and the beard he has growing along his chin and the sides of his face. I instantly feel my thong dampen, and I become aware that my juices are seeping out of the sides and are now coating his bed. As embarrassed as I should be, I’m not. A small part of me thinks Arsen would find it sexy and try to lick the blanket clean.

Kinky bastard.

“Keep lookin’ at me like that, and I’ll gladly feed you my cock.” He leans into me, pushing his dick further into my face. I find myself instinctively backing away. Everything about Arsen is intimidating, including the massive dick he wants to shove down my throat.

“I’ll talk.” I muster up the courage to ignore the blazing need to taste him and focus on why I was in here. His head lifts slightly, and the pressure he has on my knees goes away as he takes a large step back. Feeling able to breathe again, I run my palms down my thighs to calm myself and release any nerves I’m experiencing. But, whenever I am Arsen’s presence, there’s no getting rid of the anxiety. He’s a powerful enigma wherever he is, and that was never going to change.

“Talk.” He signals softly. “Please.” He urges, causing my stomach to flip with his seriousness. For some reason, I wanted him close. To either be touching or holding me as I laid out my secrets to him just so I would know he’s staying.

Would he bolt once I told him?

Would he tell me to leave his house or worse?

Theories of what could happen dance around my head, but I knew it was time. If he truly wants all of me, then he needs to know.

“I knew I wasn’t like other girls when I was sixteen.” I confess on a long breath and stammering heart. “Something was off in my head that I couldn’t quite grasp yet, but I knew I was different. I felt it deep inside of me.”

Arsen watches me intensely, soaking in every word I’m saying as if he’s eager for more. But the more I go on, the more my stomach twists and turns. “It started off innocent. A simple schoolgirl crush that I had on certain boys that were in my class. At first, my attraction towards them seemed normal. I’d doodle their names in my notebooks, gossip to my friends about them, just your average teenage girl antics. But I remember something clicking in my head like I needed something more. Something that young girls shouldn’t desire or even think about.” My eyes cast downward as emotions come flooding in. The shame, the anger, the fucking embarrassment was overbearing, but Arsen appears indifferent about what he’s hearing. And if anything, his indifference makes me hopeful. “I kept my urges secret. I remained a dutiful daughter, a satisfactory student until everything fucking imploded on me.”

“Urges?” He interrupts with scrunched-up brows and a scowl. On a deep breath, I focus solely on his eyes before answering.

“I’m a sex addict, Arsen.”

His jaw locks, but his eyes remain the same, dark and unreadable. I feel relieved of the weight that's been dragging me down, but the nervousness inside me doesn’t subside. “I was sent to St. Catherine’s because I was careless. I was tired of pretending to be someone I wasn’t. I was sick of being labeled as perfect. Everything in my life was piling up, and I couldn’t take it. I needed to indulge, just this once.” I shake my head, feeling the anger from the betrayal strike me hard and fast. “Just this once I thought I could finally be free. I needed to be touched more than I needed my next fucking breath.”

His nostrils flare, and his arms tighten as if he was pissed. But what could he possibly be mad about? The thought of me having sex with someone other than him? Maybe.

“But they both screwed me over.” I growl, feeling a tear fall from my cheek and into my lap.

“Both?” He snarls wildly, running a hand through his hair.

Fuck.

Cringing, I nibble at my lower lip, sensing a strong hint of jealousy coursing through Arsen’s body. “They recorded us having sex. Without my permission. Without me knowing. They uploaded it online, and everyone at school, including my parents, found out.”

His wickedly handsome face is now filled with rage. Rage like I’ve never seen before. His jaw is locked tight, and so are his fists at his sides, but it was his eyes that sent a violent quake through me. A deep pool of blackness permeated his eyes. Something dark and deadly that intermingled together to create the ominous shade. Was I foolish to want to calm him or even tell him to come closer? I wanted to, but I was afraid.

“Christ...” He mumbles in a deep growl as his head drops back and he closes his eyes. Was he finally realizing that he didn’t want me? My head was filtering with horrible assumptions that I was beginning to feel physically ill.

“Now you know why I was reluctant to tell you.” I argue as shame fills me. “You’re looking at me like everyone else does now.”

My words spark his attention, and he swiftly rushes me. I instinctively fall back onto his bed as he cages me in, leaning both palms to each side of my head until he’s hovering above me with a scowl. “And how the fuck am I looking at you?” He searches my eyes angrily, huffing in my face with fiery fury. His legs are firmly pressed up against mine, making it extremely difficult to concentrate on anything other than his body. But as I blink my eyes in uneasiness, I refocus.

“A whore.” I madly seethe. “Like a goddamn whore.” I try to shake his body off me, but he’s too heavy and too strong to overpower. I flip my head back and forth fiercely, but he quickly catches my chin with his fingers and forces my face forward.

“Look at me.” He demands, painfully squeezing his digits onto the flesh of my face to get my attention. “You’re not a whore, Charlotte.” He orders sharply into my face like it will seep through my pores. “You know why?”

“No.” I whisper, watching his mouth closely as he clenches his teeth.

“Because you never were and never will be one.” He commands while ensuring our eyes are interlocked. “And from now on, the only cock you’ll be fucking is mine.”

Liquid hot sparks burst throughout my body, and I immediately slacken underneath him. His hooded eyes inhale every part of my face along with the emotions that I display, making it harder and harder for me to focus. I was melting under his heated stare, but it was my blazing core that needed prompt relief. “You think I’d run from this? Run from you once I found out?” He grinds himself into me hard, proving to me that I was foolish to think that.

“Why wouldn’t you?” I gasp, loving every jab of friction he produces on my body.

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