Page 56 of The Secrets of a Sin

CHARLOTTE

After finding out about Mr. Rossi and who he truly was, I completely panicked. I ran out of there before Rolland or anyone else could stop me, and I didn’t stop until I reached the safety of my room.

I knew his and Phoebe’s darkest secret and now it made sense why they hid it. He was an older married man while she was one of the young, damaged girls he taught. To society, it was taboo, but as twisted and perverse as it may be, whatever they had must have been real by the obvious affection they showed in their letters to one another. But what didn’t make sense now was him allegedly assaulting Phoebe. Was he really just a perv who preyed on younger women? Or was there something else going on? My mind was racing as my feet paced back and forth in my room. I was afraid I might leave imprints on the carpet from my continuous trotting.

Questions upon questions surfaced in my head, but nothing was making sense. Too much has happened within such a short time span that my head was beginning to crumble from the constant anxiety and restlessness I’ve been experiencing. It was as if my addiction was no longer my main focus. Calamity was all around me and made it its mission to drag me down right with it until I was suffocating in everyone else’s problems. And now I had more on my plate. I discovered a truth that would hopefully unlock the answers to Phoebe’s untimely death, but I had a feeling it wasn’t just going to end here.

Still bouncing around my room, I knew I needed to tell Arsen somehow. With no phone, no way of contacting him at all, all I could do was wait until nightfall to see if he would show up. My angst was already through the roof, and the idea of waiting hours to tell Arsen didn’t sit right with me at all. I was already getting queasy thinking about it, so I knew I had to take matters into my own hands regardless of what I knew I had to do. So, mustering enough courage, I gather my strength and walk out of the door, heading towards Principal Welch’s office. Assuming classes were canceled, the teachers are most likely all in a room together, coming up with a way to notify the parents that another misfortunate has happened at St. Catherine’s. Thus, making it the perfect opportunity to sneak into Welch’s office unnoticed so I can find Phoebe’s file. I bypass girls who are hovered together in the hallway and turn down one last curve until I see her office door. My feet start to slow, and my heart begins to pick up as I peer around me for any evidence of students or teachers, but I realize I’m completely alone.

As I come to a stop just outside her door, I lightly give the wood a few taps and wait for a response, but when I don’t hear anything, I slowly pull on the knob and walk inside. The lights in her office are off but the sun that’s illuminating through the window gives me enough light to see what I’m doing. Tiptoeing as softly and as quickly as I can, I circle around her large oak desk until I’m directly in front of the filing cabinet that's filled with files of St. Catherine’s students. Peering at each drawer, I notice they are all labeled alphabetically, from the top starting at A through F, then the one below G to L. I quickly tug on the second cabinet and pull it all the way out until I can see the rows of files come into view. I sift through the champagne-colored binders hurriedly, glancing at each printed name written on the label until I realize that Phoebe’s folder is no longer in here. As I reach the end of all the files, I realize that she must have thrown it out after her death.

Grunting, I shut the cabinet and start to search elsewhere. I know it will only be a matter of time before she comes back to her office, so with rapid intent, I scour the rest of the room for anything that could help me. Opening and closing her desk drawers, all I discover are miscellaneous items such as pens, gum, paper clips, but then something catches my eyes on the top of her desk. Her phone.

It’s resting screen down beside her computer, and though I know I shouldn’t pick it up, I do anyway. I was that desperate for a way to get a hold of Arsen.

As I quickly grab the phone and turn it around, I tap the screen and realize it isn’t password-protected so I immediately gain access. There was a chance she didn’t have his contact info, and I was just creating a bigger issue for myself, so opening her contacts, I scroll and scroll until the name ‘Hale’ appears on the screen. Now Hale could be anyone. He could be a family member, friend, perhaps her husband's name which is highly unlikely, but a gut feeling told me it was Arsen. I stuck with that feeling and pressed the call button. Bringing the phone up to my ear, I study the door for any movements or shadows as the ringing sound begins to blare in my ear.

Please answer.

The ringing continues for what feels like minutes, then suddenly his voice emerges from the speaker.

“What do you want, Welch?” His gruff, irritated tone sinks into my ears and warms my belly as a collective sigh of relief escapes my mouth.

“It’s me, Charlotte. Now, before you say anything, I have to make this quick because I snuck into Welch’s office and am using her phone without her permission.” I let out a breath of air. “You need to come here, now.” I try not to show urgency in my tone, but it was unavoidable.

“What the fuck is going on?” He harshly asks as I hear something in the background as if he’s rising to his feet. “Are you hurt?”

“No, but you need to get here now. If you happen to see any cops at the entrance of the school, park down the street, and I’ll come find you.”

“Charlotte...” He warns as I hear him scurrying around in the background. “I’m seriously going to lose my shit if you don’t tell me what's going on?” He delivers on a heavy breath that sounds half-concerned and half-wanting to discipline me. Instead of giving him answers, I feel a slight jab to my stomach then respond quickly.

“Hurry, I’ll be waiting.” And with that, I hang up the phone. I could already sense the rage coursing through Arsen’s head right about now, but I couldn’t worry about that. I needed to erase the call from her phone and make it out of her office without being seen. Swiftly deleting any evidence of the phone call, I set the phone back down on her desk exactly how I found it, then circle back around her desk to the door. Pulling on the handle, I gently push open the door and peer my head out.

Silence.

The hallway is empty and void of any students or teachers, so luckily, I am able to step out and close the door without being discovered. Exhaling, I briefly close my eyes and soothe the nerves and jitters that I was experiencing just moments ago. My battering heart seems to be leveling out as well as the shakiness in my knees, but my head keeps aching with the amount of fear and unanswered questions lingering inside. I was beginning to feel as though I was trapped inside a never-ending horror movie, and I happened to be the main character. While tragedy continued to strike St. Catherine’s, I was always seemed to be present, and, no matter what, I was dragged into it. I was the girl Annalise, Priscilla, and Verity were intrigued about, and I was also the girl who Arsen couldn’t seem to get enough of. I couldn’t understand the attraction or the pull they had towards me. And it wasn’t just the people who’ve entered my life. It was also the devastation that seemed to follow me wherever I went.

Unfortunately, I was the girl stuck in the middle of all of it, with no way of escaping. And I had a feeling I wasn’t going to break free anytime soon.

“Charlotte? Are you okay?” A timid voice interrupts as my eyes shoot open and find Sister Mary walking towards me with a frown. She comes to a stop directly in front of me, and I can already feel my heart rate pick up its pace once again.

“Oh, I’m fine. Just resting my eyes for a second.” I respond with the wave of my hand in hopes that my lie comes off believable.

“You look incredibly pale, Charlotte. Are you sure you’re okay? Were you looking for Principal Welch?” She studies me intently, combing her eyes down the length of me until they lift back up.

“I thought I’d come by and ask what happened to Mr. Rossi. I saw some officers inside the school and him in handcuffs.” I go on with my lie. “I was worried something terrible had happened.”

Her frown deepens, causing her blue eyes to shift into a darker shade. “Yes. I’m afraid that he will no longer be teaching at St. Catherine’s.” She confesses.

“Do you know why?” I ask, thinking she may know more about the story than I do. Her eyes stray from mine, peering into the distance like she’s revolted by what she has to say.

“His sins have finally caught up with him.” She mumbles before tilting her chin upwards. “Now it’s in God's hands to see if he is worthy of forgiveness.” Her usually calm tone now alters into something bleak as her eyes continue to appear murky and distant. Sister Mary was never one to show anger or anything even resembling it, but right now, as she stood in front of me, something cold migrated through my veins. There was something odd and ominous about the way her stare never vacated from mine as her blatant fury began to rise from underneath her flesh. I could see a darkness creep into the air around us. I could feel its effects blanket over me and seep through my pores, only to cause a restlessness that even I couldn’t comprehend. Sister Mary wasn’t a scary woman. She was the least scary person I have ever encountered, but something about our interaction right now made me feel otherwise.

“I, uh, I should get going.” I shuffle past her quickly, feeling her eyes watch my every move.

“Of course.” She lifts one side of her mouth, twisting her head to follow my motions, but once I’m at a far enough distance from her, she spins back around.

Taking a sharp right turn and now fully out of Sister Mary’s view, I break out into a fast jog that immediately burns my calves because I haven’t been running lately. Ever since I discovered Phoebe’s body, I haven’t made any attempt to resume my morning jogs. With everything going on in my life, running seems to have been put on the back burner while I focus on more pressing matters. But with each long stride of my legs, I feel a small grin appear on my lips as I’m brought back to the simpler days when running was my only hardship. I missed my runner’s high and the endorphins that filtered through my body as I pushed my legs further and harder until my lungs charred. I loved every bit of the adrenaline I endured, but even though it gave me a high, it wasn’t one that I craved.

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