Page 36 of The Secrets of a Sin

“You scared now?” Her voice sounds different, low, and gruff as she messes with the collar of her shirt. Her expression is hard to read, but a hint of displeasure was clear to see. Without the feeling of both her hands, I struggle to relax my deprived body and exhale deeply.

“I’m good.”

I feel an entirely different feeling now. Closing my eyes for a quick second in hopes of calming myself, Arsen flashes in my head, and the tingles hit harder. Gushing through my skin, I feel the sting seep through my bones, entering the deepest parts of me. Even when he isn’t near, I still fantasize about him. Snapping my eyes open, I notice Priscilla walking ahead without me. Sighing, I quickly catch up to her and trail at her feet.

“What’s that?” I point in the distance, not quite sure what it is because it is still obscured by some trees.

“Our destination.” Priscilla mumbles in front of me as we slowly approach what appear to be ruins. Extremely old, dated statues that look ready to crumble at any second. I first noticed the staircase, and my mouth dropped to the floor at its beauty. It winded off into a slight curve and led to nothing. Covered in green moss and dark pigment, I marvel at the relic. All three girls darted off towards the cement pad in the center, beside the staircase, and behind it was an arch that reached towards the sky.

“There you girls are!” Annalise shouts with a hand to her forehead as she meets my stare. Her eyes narrow slightly at Priscilla, and I hear a quiet growl escape from her lips. “Have fun?” She angrily directs the question at Priscilla, but she doesn’t seem fazed. Instead, she brushes past Annalise and plops down onto her ass beside Verity. Awkwardly, my feet slowly move towards them, focusing on how all three of them watch me like I am their only source of entertainment, but they aren’t smiling or laughing. Annalise observed me closely like you would a prey. Verity viewed me with indifference, and Priscilla looked as if she was contemplating whether she liked me or not.

“Sit here.” Annalise patted the spot beside her, and I swiftly dropped down with grace, making sure my center was concealed. All in the same circle as before, something felt different as we sat on the ground beneath these ancient ruins. Outside school property, we were all alone without rules, teachers, or faith in our way. We could be ourselves.

“What do you guys do out here?” I speak up first, cutting through the thick tension between us. They all glance back and forth at each other like they're figuring out who will respond.

“Talk.” Annalise shrugs. “Get away from everyone at school where we’re not being watched like fucking hawks all the time.” Annalise informs. “We feel free out here.”

“What do you talk about?” I ask, noticing Priscilla mess with her collar again as if she’s trying to loosen it. My whole life, I’ve felt the tightness of good morals and being an unblemished daughter slowly constrict me, and no matter how hard I tried to catch my breath, I was always going to be on the verge of strangulation. Perhaps that's how we all felt at St. Catherine’s, always on the edge of something detrimental, but we somehow managed to survive.

“Everything. And right now, we’re all curious about you.” Annalise moves her hand, so it’s now resting on top of mine. My stare drops down to her perfectly manicured fingers and how different our hands look compared to one another. My nails were short and painted a pale nude color, while hers are bright pink with added length. “We want to know more about you.” Her voice comes out soft and spellbinding like she knew exactly how to reel me in. I had a feeling that whenever she wanted something, she undoubtedly got it.

“Not the boring stuff like what your favorite color is or where you're from. We want something juicy.” Verity grins deeply. “I think you know what we want.”

Of course, I knew what they wanted to hear, but revealing that was something I wasn’t willing to share. I hated how it ruled my life like, no matter where I was in life, it’s always bound to resurface. “It’s not that juicy.” I brush it off with a chuckle, hoping they’ll let it go, but Annalise’s hand squeezes mine reassuringly.

“We're not here to judge you. We all have our issues, but we choose to embody them.” She smirks beside me. “How about this? We share our story, and you share yours?”

Tugging onto my bottom lip, I drop my gaze feeling her persuasion sink into me.

How could I deny telling my story if they are so willing to tell me theirs?

On a sigh, I reluctantly nod my head. “Okay.”

Annalise immediately grins and squeezes my hand for reassurance. “I was in love before.” Annalise half-smiles, but her eyes reveal the true sadness in her words. “I never meant for it to happen, but when it did, I knew everything in my life was going to change.” Her eyes drift off into a despairing haze that even I feel its effects slowly creep into my heart. “They were unattainable. Completely off-limits with a silver ring around their finger and everything, but that didn’t stop us. We were explosive together, like the once-in-a-lifetime kind of love that you should never let slip from your fingers, but when we got discovered, they chose to live safe rather than follow their heart.” I watch as her head drops slowly, and a single tear falls from her face onto the pavement. “I didn’t want to believe it, so I kept contacting them, and then one thing led to another, and I was labeled a ‘stalker’. Which I think is complete bullshit because I only followed them a few times without them knowing. But that was only because I needed to get them alone without their spouse hovering every fucking second of every day.” She growls as her head lifts in rebellion. With her delicate chin pointed high, she continues. “So, because of my supposed ‘stalker’ tendencies, I was sent here. My mother thought I would get fixed in one year, but I’ve been here for over two now. I think they’ve officially lost all hope.” With another ‘oh well’ shrug, she doesn’t seem bothered by the fact her parents gave up. If anything, she looks chillingly happy. Nodding toward Priscilla, signaling that it’s her turn to confess, she grunts in annoyance. Rolling her eyes, she repositions herself, so she’s now resting both elbows on her dirty knees with an irked expression.

“I stabbed an asshole with my pencil.” She rambles off, nonchalantly.

“That’s all you're going to say...” Verity scoffs.

“What more do you want me to say?” She argues with a scowl. “That I’d do it all over again just to hear that fucker scream like a banshee? He was asking for it when he groped my ass like I was one of his whores.” She sneers with clenched fists as if she’s replaying the memory in her head. “I should have done more than just stabbed him with my pencil.” Priscilla grumbles low under her breath.

“What she's trying to get across is that she hates men.” Verity informs in a whisper as she leans to her left towards me. Priscilla must have heard what she whispered because the mention of ‘men’ has her scowling with a scrunched-up face. She happily grins, seesawing back and forth on her thighs like a giddy child on Christmas. While Verity appears oblivious, Annalise and Priscilla both look as if they want to ambush her, both unmoving with deep snarls on their mouths. I slowly realize that Verity is the black sheep of the group, which is odd. One would assume Annalise and her would have more in common, but even just from my few encounters with them, I can tell Verity was the odd one out. Once she realizes they are both glaring daggers in her direction, she slumps down with a frown. “Not like hate hates them.” She mumbles.

“Tell Charlotte why you’re here, Verity.” Priscilla announces in almost a half-shout. Sitting up tall, she watches Verity with a close eye and intimidating gaze. “Tell her the struggle of being the daughter of a failing actress and father who can’t keep it in his pants.” My eyes fly to Verity to gauge her reaction, and her face matches her fiery hair. She looks seconds away from tears but holds it together. “Must have been tough living in that multi-million-dollar mansion with the endless supply of pills your mom was on.”

“Shut up.” Verity snaps.

“Your mom was too fucking out of it to notice her daughter was higher than her from downing hall off her own pills.” Priscilla laughs cruelly with an ominous smirk as if she was enjoying this. I wait for Annalise to step in, but as my eyes shift towards her, she watches with interest.

“Don’t pretend like you know my whole story, Priscilla. I could have easily coughed up your fucked-up background, but I didn’t.” Verity cries out only for Priscilla to slope forward on the palms of her hands with a growl.

“Don’t you dare talk about my story like it’s anywhere close to yours. You were just a little rich bitch who wanted attention.” Priscilla screams as her words echo off the stones and vanish into the forest. “And you still do.”

Profoundly uncomfortable and ready to split, Annalise breaks in with a clap. “You both are acting like idiots right now. Priscilla, you quit being a bitch. Verity’s story is just as important as yours. And, Verity, quit making dumb comments that you know will piss her off.” They both roll their eyes in unison, but oddly, they listen to Annalise and cool down. Priscilla reluctantly pulls away from Verity and messes with her bun. “Can’t you two just get along?”

They both grunt in response, but I notice the change in them. It’s like a bucket of ice has been dumped over their heads. Verity brushes her hair with her fingers, and Priscilla picks at her nails. A cool gust of air hovers over me, and that’s when I realize Annalise has now focused her attention back on me. They didn’t forget about me. They were still eager to hear my story, and if I didn’t go through with it, I’d feel like shit, especially after listening to theirs.

“Give us what we want, little mouse. We promise no judgment.” Annalise smiles reassuringly. I hate the nickname they have for me. It makes me sound weak and small. But I guess to them I was a mute stranger, just a girl who liked to stay in the shadows, but now I had been found.

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