“It wasn’t always abandoned.” Jack announced beside me, causing my gaze to focus on his side profile.
“You used to come here?” I ask, feeling my heart fill.
“At night when it was closed I’d sneak in.” He admitted with a look of remembrance across his face. “During the day it was too busy, and I hated the fucking crowds of people.”
A light smile appears on his face as he sets the basket down next to his feet.
“What would you do here?” The question rolls off my tongue as I imagine a young Jack roaming around here at night.
“Anything I wanted.” Pulling out a small blanket from the basket, he lays it across the tall grass before offering me his hand.
“Did you ever get caught?”
Placing my small hand in his, I had a feeling I knew the answer but still felt the need to ask.
“Never.” He winked before pulling me down onto the soft blanket so we were now sitting side by side.
“You came here alone as a kid?” I watch as he digs through the basket pulling out a plate of sandwiches and a couple bowls. “Weren’t you ever scared to be out here?”
It was creepy being out here with Jack, I could only imagine being out here alone.
“Growing up, being scared wasn’t an option.” He grunts, handing me a bottle of water. “At ten, I learned quickly that we didn’t live like most families do. Where most kids were enrolled in summer camps learning how to tie knots, I was shooting guns. And by fourteen, I knew exactly what artery to cut to kill a man.”
The pure horror and sorrow across my face burned through Jack as he nonchalantly tossed back his water. Sure, I believed that Jack had certain demons that he dealt with on a daily basis, but after discovering this, I didn’t know what to think.
“Jesus Jack, why would your parents teach you that?” I ask astonished that he acted like it was a completely normal thing.
“I’m not a victim, Becca.” He stops what he’s doing and turns half his body to peer at me. “I had a decent life growing up, privileged even. But, I chose a different path, a better one for my son and me.” Dropping his head, black hair falls around him. “My past is better off left dead and buried nine feet in the ground.”
I stare into his confident loving eyes, knowing that the man he was today, was the man I fell for. Despite the past that he tries to hide.
Still confused, my brows dip wanting to ask a million more questions of why he didn’t want to talk about his past with me. He should know by now that I’d understand. That whatever he’d say wouldn’t change my mind about him.
“If you think your past would push me away, it wouldn’t.” I crawl towards him in hopes he’d finally unload everything he’s hiding. His eyes darken as I swing a leg over his body and completely straddle him. “I want to understand you, Jack. And I can’t unless you let me in, fully.”
With his palms resting on my bare thighs, I search his eyes for answers. Instead, I feel his forehead drop onto mine as a deep sigh of anguish escapes from his lips.
“One day I will. I’ll tell you everything you want to know.” His voice sounds broken, like he’s worried about how I’d react.
“But?” I ask, defeated as he pulls his hand from my thigh and cradles my face.
“I’m not ready for you to hate me.” He whispered over my lips, as his confession stung my heart.
I could never hate him.
Even when I first met Jack, I didn’t hate him.
Placing my hand over the top of his, I hold him there, exploring his face like it’s my first time.
“How could I hate you when I’m in love with you?” I surprise myself as the words fall from my lips and Jack’s eyes widen in shock.
Second guessing myself, I begin to pull back but Jack’s stronghold tightens around me.
“Say it again.” He grunts as his intense stare changes from adoring to hungry in seconds.
This time with confidence, I capture his face with both hands and look him straight on.
“I love you Jack, more than I’ve loved anyone before.”