Page 61 of The Romance Library

‘Fair enough.’ I nodded. ‘Well, your ex sounds like a twisted, narcissistic arsehole and you’re better off without him.’

‘Yeah.’

‘And you haven’t read anything since you left?’

‘Nope. And it’s a shame because I was really enjoying that book.’

‘So you don’t read anymore because you find it too triggering?’ I asked. Jessica nodded.

‘Sounds silly, but every time I go to pick a book up, I have his face and voice in my head, judging me.’

‘It doesn’t sound silly. He sucked all your joy for reading away. Made you feel ashamed. But you have nothing to be ashamed of. He’s the problem. Not you. Have you tried listening to the audiobook of that novel instead? Maybe hearing it read aloud might be different. I used to love my mum reading to me and my brothers.’

‘How many brothers do you have?’

‘Two.’

‘It’s nice that she read to you. Did she do it often?’

‘Every single night. She was brilliant at it. She used to really get into the story and do different voices and accents for the characters. It was so fun.’ As I remembered being tucked up in bed with Mum beside me and her warm smile, my heart swelled. ‘Having a bedtime story was the highlight of my day. That was one of the things I missed the most when she died.’

‘I’m so sorry.’ Jessica’s eyes widened and her voice softened. ‘I…’

She paused, opening her mouth like she wanted to say something, then quickly snapping it shut again. Didn’t surprise me. Whenever I told people, they didn’t know how to react and always worried about saying the wrong thing.

‘Thanks,’ I said, filling the silence and trying to let her know that she didn’t need to feel awkward. ‘She died of a brain tumour.’

‘Shit. That’s awful. How old were you?’

‘Nine.’

‘Oh my God, Theo.’ She reached for my hand, instantly setting my blood on fire. ‘Losing a mother at any age is devastating, but it must’ve been even worse to lose her so young.’

‘Tell me about it. So, yeah, I know it’s not the same, but I remember the joy that reading books can bring. When Mum passed and Father hired a nanny, I used to ask if she could read to me, but he told them not to. Said it would make me soft. He believed that filling my head with fairy tales wouldn’t help me in the real world. Then I got shipped off to boarding school…’ My voice trailed off. I hated that place. ‘I wish I could read more now, but I basically live at the office, so there’s never any time.’

‘Maybe you could try audiobooks too. Or get a Kindle so you can read in between meetings or something. That reminds me!’ She reached into her handbag and pulled out an e-reader. ‘Look at this! It was Mrs Davis’s Kindle.’

‘That’s the woman you’re representing for the library, right?’

‘Yep. Anyway, guess how many books she has on here?’

‘How many?’

‘Three thousand!’ she gasped.

‘I didn’t even realise you could store so many books on a Kindle!’

‘Me neither. I’m trying to pluck up the courage to start reading some of them. She’s got every possible book I could ever want to read on it.’

‘Really? Including the one you never finished?’

‘Yep. I almost started reading it yesterday. It’s that one.’ I pointed to the screen.

‘Would you… never mind.’ I clamped my mouth shut.

‘What? Tell me!’ she shouted. ‘What were you going to say?’

‘It’s a stupid idea.’

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