Page 1 of The Match Faker

1

Mia

‘How’s your love life, Mia?’ Aunty Doreen appeared in front of me, eyes wide.

My sister’s extravagant tenth wedding anniversary party had only started an hour ago and I already wanted to leave.

Although I knew this annoying question always came up at family events, I still hadn’t worked out the perfect response.

I could either tell the truth and confess that my love life was as vibrant as a corpse and end up being pitied like I had an incurable disease.

Or I could lie, say I was madly in love and enjoy the validation that came when people heard you’d been ‘saved’ from being single.

But I was rubbish at lying, so I decided to change the subject instead.

‘Aunty Doreen!’ I gripped the stem of my champagne flute tighter to calm my racing heartbeat. ‘What time are they cutting the cake?’

My eyes flicked to the long tables dressed with white-and-gold linen which matched the decor of the grand hall my sister Alice had hired in central London. Must’ve cost her a fortune.

Silver platters of fancy canapés were elegantly laid out alongside the elaborate three-tier anniversary cake that was still intact. Dammit.

‘Not sure.’ Aunty Doreen shrugged, adjusting the pearl necklace resting on her brown patterned dress. ‘It’s still early.’

‘I’ll go and check.’

‘Wait!’ She blocked my path. The DJ turned up a popular Beyoncé song. Wouldn’t be surprised if my aunt had requested that he play ‘All By Myself’ by Celine Dion next. ‘You didn’t answer my question. So? Are you dating? I heard what happened with your last boyfriend. Terrible thing.’

My stomach twisted. Terrible was an understatement, but the less I thought about what my scumbag ex had done to me, the better.

‘Strange that you didn’t see that coming’—she pursed her lips—‘but it’s been ages. You must be seeing someone else by now!’

I glanced at Alice on the dance floor, wondering if she could save me from what I knew was about to become a full-blown interrogation. Alice was dressed in a white silk gown, her long wavy hair extensions flowing behind her as she gazed lovingly into her husband’s eyes.

My sister’s brown skin was the same tone as mine, but whilst I had an oily T-zone that always made me look too shiny in photos, Alice’s complexion was flawless. Just like her make-up tonight.

I smoothed down the front of my blue knee-length dress and fiddled with my thick, dark hair, which I’d styled into an updo.

Alice wouldn’t have to deal with awkward questions like this. Despite being two years younger than me, she always landed on her feet. Perfect house, perfect job and perfect husband. I was glad one of us was doing well.

My aunt twiddled her thumbs impatiently. She wanted an answer and wasn’t going to leave until I gave her one.

‘I’ve been focused on my business, so haven’t had a chance to date.’

There. Done. Stock answer remembered and successfully delivered.

Time to move on and speak about the weather, the Kardashians, global warming or house prices.

Anything except my love life.

Please.

My cousin’s two little boys sprinted across the hall, and as one of them almost slipped on the shiny tiled floor, my heart jumped in my mouth. They were playing dangerously close to the DJ’s laptop. I was about to suggest they be careful, but didn’t want to spoil their fun. The DJ waved his finger at them, so hopefully they’d move somewhere safer.

‘Oh yes! Your escorting business!’

‘My what?’ I replied, my eyebrows almost hitting the ceiling.

‘Don’t worry!’ she shouted over the music. ‘Your secret’s safe with me. If you want to help sad, desperate men, why shouldn’t you?’

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