Page 21 of Return By Fire

I remember the months leading up to my nephew's birth like yesterday.

Stepping on a beach briar, I let out a soundless hiss. Grabbing my foot, I clutch the bottom even as I begin hopping up and down from the pain. “Fucking hell.”

Once the stinging stops, I put my foot back in the sand and just feel a dull throb in its place.

It’s not lost on me that this is a clear allegory for what Jed’s experienced knowing there’s been a Kevin in the world and not once confronting either Kara or Maris about it. Dropping onto my ass into the sand, I contemplate everything Jed shared about Maris—things I can’t share with Kara.

Did he do it to put us on the same playing field with us both having secrets or to impress upon me the truth—that his knowledge of Kevin wasn’t his sister’s fault.

I draw my finger through the sand and mutter, “Well, I was looking for a challenge.” Jed Smith’s presence here is going to be that, for sure.

Despite the stories I’ve heard over the years, I wasn’t expecting the way his blue eyes scorched through me.

I wasn’t expecting him.

How could I when the descriptions I’d heard usually involved a lot of laughter between Kara and Maris, involved descriptions of ceaseless pairs of flamingo shorts and “deranged” looks.

I stretch my arms out and lace my fingers behind my head before lying back in the sand. “So, the villain’s looks aren’t always photogenic,” I murmur. As a boy, I’d always loved all the villains—Vader, Tyler Durden, and my sphincter puckers when I think about the best one of all. “Fuck. Give Jed some heavy-duty hair product and he could double for Hockley from Titanic.”

I think about the way Billy Zane portrayed the character and compare him to the very memorable Jed Smith. Hostile, antagonistic, charismatic, powerful, and hot as fuck.

My gut clenches a bit even as my heart feels the slightest betrayal. “Yeah. That’s why we all secretly love the bad boy.”

So, I find Jed incredibly intriguing. There’s nothing wrong with that. I’m a healthy man with a sexual appetite I haven’t indulged in far too long. My heart pounds harder in my chest when I confess to nothing but the stars, “I’m attracted to him. I was from the moment I saw him outside of the fish camp.”

And there’s the crux of my problem. I like him in a way I haven’t liked a man in far too long. I give my semi-hard cock a glare. I’d just have to be heartless to do something about it.

“What the hell is supposed to happen?” I ask as the moonlight kisses my skin.

I try to think about it logically. “We have two sisters who are best friends keeping the kind of secrets that alter lives. And for fun, ladies and gents, they’re dragging their two older brothers as accomplices.”

But as I think back, would I have done anything different?

Clear as day, the answer comes to me in the form of a text from Kevin.

Kara:

Hi, Uncle Dean. Going to bed. Be safe :)

Dean:

You too, buddy. Sleep well.

Through the years, Kevin has given me fatherhood in a way I never could have experienced it. I was the first to hold him when he was born, the first to see his smile—though Kara claims to this day it was gas. I was the person Kevin took his first steps to, the person he came running to after his first day of school. Kevin is mine in every way except conception.

John Jennings missed out on everything by his own choice.

It’s not my place to absolve Jed’s friend from the emotions he feels if and when he finds out about the boy I helped raise. It’s not my place to offer Jed Smith a place in Kevin’s life but I wonder if, like I’ve taught Kevin, it’s my responsibility to provide him with an apology. Even though I personally didn’t make the choice to change the winds that flow through Jed’s sails, they have changed. He’s in for some rough seas, I think grimly.

With that in mind, I push to a sitting position and send a text. Rising to my feet, I adroitly avoid the beach briars and make my way back to my Jeep to grab my go bag before heading into the firehouse to get some rest.

About ten minutes later, I get a reply message from Maris with her brother’s phone number. Before I can talk myself out of it, I send him a quick text before powering down my phone.

Dean:

If you don’t have plans tomorrow, come see me at the station.

When I get Jed’s response asking for the location, I try to tamper down my excitement. It’s likely he just wants to talk me into working on Kara.

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