Darius: Where’s your wife?
Darius: Lol
Liam: Shut up. Have an idea. Wanna talk in person.
Darius: Ur being weird.
Liam: Can I come over or not?
Darius: Yeah, come through.
He sends me his address, and luckily it’s only a short bus ride away. I go back into the living room where Whitney is still sitting at the counter. She glances in my direction as I pull on my fleece.
“I have to go,” I tell her. “I’ll be back later.”
“Is everything okay?” she asks, turning to face me. “You just got home.”
“Everything is fine.” Staring at the woman in front of me, I realize that yet again, Whitney has been my guiding light. Her words, her advice has given me the realization I’ve been waiting for. I cross the room to her, my heart racing. “You’re amazing.”
I drop my head to hers, kissing her.
“I—”
Now isn’t the time. I’m junked up on adrenaline and halfway out the door. She’s eating curry in her fuzzy socks. But I can’t contain it. I can’t go another moment without telling Whitney how I feel about her.
“I love you,” I hear myself say, the words spilling out of me.
She blinks up at me, her expression one of total shock. A million emotions seem to flash across her face as she processes what I’ve said. I bring my hands to the side of her face, my thumbs caressing her cheeks.
“I love you,” I repeat, because it sounds so damn good hearing it. Feels so damn good to say it. “I’m in love with you.”
I close my eyes for a moment just to savor this moment. The rightness of it. When I open my eyes again, Whitney stares back at me, her mouth opened slightly. She closes it and swallows, her brown eyes searching mine.
That’s when I realize something.
She’s not going to say it back.
I feel it pass between us, the moment where she would have said it. Where she’d throw her arms around me and say I love you, too. Instead, it’s silent. Another beat passes. Another opportunity. The pressure of it bares down on me, impossible to avoid.
“You don’t have to say it back,” I choke out, hating the words as they fall from me. “I just… I’ve been wanting to say it. For a while.”
She shakes her head, seeming to break out of whatever trance she was in. “Liam?—”
“It’s okay. Really. I’ll be back later, and we can talk,” I manage, pressing a soft kiss to her forehead and turning on my heels.
I have to get out of here. Grabbing my coat and my keys, I turn to her for one last moment before opening the door. I wait for another beat to give her another chance.
She could say it now.
We lock eyes, a breath passing between us as I wait for the words that I want so badly to hear. The three little words that aren’t coming.
“I’ll see you later,” I whisper into the silence, then I turn on my heels, heading out into the cold.
39
WHITNEY
Iblink into the empty room, tremors rocking through my body, cold blanketing me like a winter shadow.