Page 63 of Whatever Will Be

“That’s not happening.” I pull her to me and stroke her hair. “We would never let that happen.”

I’m not lying. In a heartbeat I’d hand over every cent I have and hire the best lawyers to guarantee that Gretchen keeps the girls. While I’m breathing, no one will take the twins from their home or from the person who loves them the most.

She pulls back and stares at me solemnly. “I love you, Trent. Please don’t think I’m expecting you to say it back. That’s not why I’m-“

Her words get cut off by my mouth. She falls right into the kiss, closing her eyes and answering my tongue with her own. This is my future I’m holding in my arms and I’m taking it.

I’m taking her. She’s mine.

Gretchen cooperates with being pushed to her back and her legs open for me with eagerness.

“I love you too, Gretch.”

This time I make love to her with slow tenderness.

And then I tell her the same thing again.

12

Gretchen

The call comes in moments after I drop the twins off at their preschool.

My phone is clamped into the dashboard mount and one glance at the screen makes my heart race.

It’s possible I’m overreacting. The forensic accountant Trent put me in touch with might not have any earth shattering news to share. Maybe he was unable to find out anything at all.

This, I realize, is my hope.

Since I’ve been unable to discover a rational explanation for those bimonthly bank deposits, I’d rather hear no explanation at all.

I’m afraid of the truth. I’m afraid of my sister’s secrets.

Jules was fantastically loyal, supportive and trustworthy. She could have abandoned me, and Danny too. She was just a kid herself when she assumed the responsibilities of an adult. I would defend her to the death.

But she did keep her secrets, for whatever reason, even after her death. Perhaps I have no right to go digging to find them.

I make a right into a gas station and park in front of the tiny convenience store before pressing the button to answer the call.

“This is Gretchen.”

“Gretchen, hi. This is Joel Rico. Sorry it took me a week to look into your situation properly but I have your answer. Every one of those deposits comes from the same place…”

Of all the wild ideas that have been running through my head in the weeks since I looked at those bank statements, the explanation Joel gives is not one I had ever thought of.

NEVER.

I hear my own dazed voice thanking Joel for his efforts.

Then I sit there and stare at the minivan’s reflection in the glass doors of the convenience store.

I feel an abrupt, desperate longing for Trent. For his arms around me. For his deep voice to murmur in my ear that this isn’t the end of the world and we’ll figure out this mess together.

But I can’t take comfort from Trent right now. I can hardly breathe.

Ever since Jules died, I’ve been thinking of the twins’ father as some distant, detached entity who may or may not be living and definitely isn’t within reach.

It turns out that isn’t true.

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