Page 40 of Whatever Will Be

“Damn right.”

“I’m fucking terrible at this, Trent.”

“Then do a better job, Dan.”

He nods. I should tell him that the girls also got into the whiskey he left lying around but he’s already on the verge of tears so we’ll save that for another time.

Instead, I make a suggestion. “You should go in and watch the movie with them. They’d like that.”

He relaxes. “You think so?”

“Sure. They’ll expect you to sing along.”

“I can do that.” He heads for the door and pauses. “Hey, thanks for being around today. I owe you big time.”

“No problem.”

With Danny gone I don’t see much reason to lurk in the kitchen all by myself. They’ve got some family shit to work on here anyway so it’s better if I go. The living room is empty and I’m about to reach the door when I hear her voice.

“Trent.”

I turn and face Gretchen, looking as seductively lovely as ever in knee high boots and those sexy jeans. She’s removed the clip and her hair hangs loose. The girls are now singing along to their movie in the den and I hear Danny’s deep voice getting all the words wrong. Gretchen joins me near the door and now that she’s close I can see the exhaustion in her face, which pulls on my heartstrings in all kinds of unexpected ways.

“Are they all right?” I ask.

“Yes.”

“What about you?”

She laughs half heartedly and yawns. “I don’t know. I could use a nap.”

I bite off the urge to say something dirty. “Did you get your errands finished?”

“Yes and no. I was car shopping. The Toyota I’m driving is a rental but I need to return it. I drove to three different dealerships.”

“Sounds like you couldn’t find something you like.”

She grimaces. “I couldn’t find anyone willing to give me a car loan. Not the banks, not the credit union, not the dealerships. I’m currently unemployed and I have a mountain of student debt. On paper, I suppose I’m not a good risk.”

I don’t know what to say to that. I’m kicking myself for failing to realize the financial reality of her situation.

“Anyway,” she continues, “I was hoping to find something before Saturday. I need to drive to the prison to visit my father. Danny refuses to see him but I feel like someone ought to go. Jules used to visit every three months. I’m sure he’s grieving.”

I don’t even need to think twice. “I’ll drive you.”

She opens her mouth. Shuts it. I can tell her first instinct is to say no but she’s reconsidering. She rubs her arms and glances at the photo of Jules and the girls on the end table.

The same photo I knocked over on the day of the funeral.

I’m trying really hard not to remember how it felt to touch her in the only minute she’s ever been in my arms. It’s not that I’m hoping to get something out of Gretchen in exchange for a favor. No, that’s not what this is about.

Gretchen turns back to me. “I was thinking I’d ask the girls’ regular babysitter to watch them all day. She’s good with them, says she misses seeing them.”

It’s pretty clear she doesn’t want to give Danny the responsibility of looking after the twins for hours on end. After today, I can’t say that I blame her.

“Just let me know what time you want to leave on Saturday,” I say.

“Visiting hours begin at eleven. It’s about a two hour drive.” She eyes me, perhaps wondering if I’ll change my mind.