Page 79 of Pity Parade

After I explain what Heath told Trent, Faith offers, “I’ll help.”

Paige says, “I tried calling the next men on Trina’s list, but the second was in the process of becoming a priest, the third was engaged, the fourth had moved to Japan. The fifth wasn’t sure he still identified as human.”

Faith looks horrified. “What does that mean, doesn’t identify as human? Is he a furry or something?”

I shake my head, biting back a giggle at her question. “Gerald thinks he’s from another planet. He’s trying to figure out a way to go back home.” And while I’m totally down with aliens, I’m pretty sure Gerald is having some kind of mental break with reality which has nothing to do with his origins.

“So, it’s Nick or bust?” Missy asks.

“It’s either Nick, a stranger I hire to be my boyfriend, or I’m going to be the center of a horrible new dating show. Only time will tell.”

“You still have the rest of the summer,” Faith says encouragingly. Then she asks Paige, “What about the other men Tim was going to introduce Trina to from the club?”

Paige replies, “Two are on vacation, two more are older than the first guy he introduced her to, and the last turns out to be a raging alcoholic.”

I interject, “We met for coffee, and he pulled out a flask to pour into his latte.”

Faith makes a face before deciding, “I think Teddy and I got together in the nick of time. It sounds like a jungle out there.”

“That’s one word for it,” I tell her. “The good news is that I’ve moved to the cabin by the lake, and I don’t have to worry about seeing Heath anymore.”

“What if we throw some kind of singles’ event in town,” Missy suggests. “You know, a picnic in the park or a bonfire at the beach.” Gaining steam for her idea, she says, “We can put fliers up all over town and advertise on Elk Lake’s social media.”

“That’s not a bad idea,” I say, “but it would take an awful lot of work to put together.”

“Nonsense.” This from Faith. “I’ll donate the desserts, Paige can do the advertising, and Missy can offer a discount on the wedding dress if it comes to that.”

“And I’ll do the matchmaking, huh?”

“Why not?” Faith says. “It could be a lot of fun and we can do it on the Fourth of July when the whole town is out.”

I laugh. “Says the woman who’s not in jeopardy of being set up with priests, alcoholics, old men, and non-humans.”

“God help all the single people,” Faith says.

She’s got that right, but my biggest hope is that before of taking care of all the single people, God helps me first.

CHAPTER THIRTY-THREE

HEATH

I feel a new sense of purpose as I drive back to Elk Lake. After ten years, I’m finally ready to live again. Not only have I come to an acceptance about Jess, but my career focus is shifting. In a nutshell, everything is looking up.

I spy the bag of mail sitting on the passenger’s seat, and I’m tempted to throw it away. I briefly wish I’d left it for my assistant, but I gave her four weeks off and she’s currently somewhere in Asia with her girlfriend. Ah well, I’ll just keep it in the bag and go through it bit by bit. There can’t be anything too important in there because my accountant pays all my bills.

Turning on the radio, I belt out some old school Bon Jovi while ticking down the minutes to starting my new life. As Jon Bon would say, “I’m halfway there …” I’m hoping the living on a prayer portion of my life might be in the past.

I don’t know exactly how I’m going to tell Trina I’m ready to take the relationship plunge, but I want to make a grand gesture. I know it sounds strange that I’m ready to fall in love with her after only going on one date over a year ago, but I’ve thought about her a lot since that date. And I feel like I’ve really gotten to know her while she’s been in Elk Lake. I like everything about her—and that includes her feistiness.

My first stop when I get back into town is the grocery store. I pick up their biggest bouquet of flowers along with some perishables. I also buy a nice bottle of champagne and a plastic clamshell full of strawberries. Strawberries and bubbly might be cliché, but there’s a reason for that. The combination is as romantic as heck.

There’s no sign of Trina’s car when I get back to the cottage, so I go inside and reacquaint myself with my summer home. I drop the bag of mail on the kitchen counter while I unload the groceries. Then I put the champagne in the refrigerator to chill before walking out onto the deck. Staring at the pristine blue lake, I wonder if I can rent this place for longer than just the summer. If I ever wind up living here, I definitely want a waterfront home.

I hear car doors slam, so I run through the house and go out front. Trina’s here and she’s not alone. The tennis pro from the club has also pulled in, and they’re currently chatting about something.

“Trina,” I call out. “I’m back!”

She glares at me before saying, “Go suck an egg, Heath.”

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