Page 33 of The Queen

As if guided by the Stars, my fingers landed on the edge of something solid. Whatever it was, it was tangled in a length of gold brocade. I worked almost frantically to free it from the depths of a deep pocket in the skirt of the dress.

I gasped.

In my hand, I clutched a small leather-bound book. The scent of caramel was strong alongside the leather and parchment, for such a small and forgotten object. I traced the edges of the uneven pages with fingers that trembled. It seemed familiar to me, but no particular memories surfaced.

Embossed on the front of the leather cover was a curved archway surrounded by starflowers, and when I opened it, rows of flowing script met my eyes. Doodles of floral patterns, wildflowers, and bees were squished into the margins. Each page held new treasures, all in my mother’s hand. She had held this. These were her words.

Violet stood off to the side of the dressing room, seemingly unsure if she should leave me or help me. I didn’t know what I wanted her to do either, but I knew one thing.

“Tell no one,” I said, clutching the book to my chest.

Violet nodded solemnly, understanding the situation without words. She knew where the dresses had come from and who they belonged to. No further explanation was needed.

I didn’t know why I was sure, but I was positive this had to remain a secret. Things kept going wrong and after the flash of betrayal from my memories, I didn’t know who could be trusted.

Dinner was fast approaching, and I still had to get cleaned up and changed. Violet helped me strip off the dress from earlier and into the shower. I didn’t let the journal out of my sight, setting it on a table next to the bath. I didn’t suspect Violet of any malicious intent, but I didn’t know who might stop by while I was getting ready.

Maybe it was stupid to trust Violet. So many things had already gone wrong. But if she wanted to betray me, I would address that if it happened. What if it already had happened, though?

My pulse picked up speed, and my eyes remained on the book as I called out to be heard over the rushing water. “Violet?” I waited for her to reply.

It took a moment, but her shadow fell through the open bathing room door. “Did you call for me, Your Majesty?”

I stepped from the shower and turned off the water, trying to keep my breathing at a calm and steady rate. “Violet, remember the day you gave me the soap?”

She nodded slowly, as if unsure of where I was going with this.

“You said Alexi had brought it for me to use. Did he hand it to you directly?”

She shifted nervously, her skirt swishing around her ankles. “No, ma’am. Aster told me he left it for you earlier.”

Stars! Aster!

I should have known. But was it just a stupid prank from someone that perceived me as a rival, or something more than that?

“Thank you.” I breathed out a sigh of relief, glad that she wasn’t behind the swap, and grabbed a towel to dry off with. “I’m sorry for the odd question. It’s been that sort of day.”

Violet helped me dress and did my hair, smiling and making small talk. She told me how wildflowers were bursting with color all over the mountain, and crops that’d been parched and struggling were thick with blooms. It was getting late in the growing season, but if the early frosts held off, there would be a good harvest this autumn.

Her idle chatter may not have meant much to her, but hearing that there would be food and water for the people through the cold months did something to me. Warmth and contentment washed over me like the embrace of a loved one.

My responsibility for the people grew alongside my sense of belonging, but so did my unease. I wanted happiness and peace, but there were unknown factors working against me.

I didn’t know if I was ever going to be worthy of being the queen. But I was going to try.

Chapter Twenty-Two

Saphyra

Tense about the upcoming dinner, I paced the short length of my room, feeling trapped under the weight of my fancy, cream-colored gown. The heavy skirt whispered across the cold metal floor of my newest cage, not helping my apprehension at all.

Nervousness infused my very being right down to the soles of my feet.

Something was going to go wrong. I just knew it, and I hadn’t even left my cabin yet. Violet did her best to reassure me, but it was an irrational fear her words couldn’t banish. The closer the time came, the more worried I was.

It did nothing to help my anxiety when she let Lex into the room. He was dressed in a perfectly fitted black suit and confidence, which he wore just as well as he wore his clothes. Gone were the standard uniform fatigues, and in their place were sleek, tailored slacks and a matching jacket. He was built for this life, and his purposeful ease only highlighted my position as an outsider.

The claustrophobic feeling of my quarters intensified when he stepped through the door. The scent of warm oak trees, overwhelming, and his presence, stifling. Everything about him was like a dream, far too good to be real. Everything I’d ever wanted, but I knew the truth of this place and it wasn’t as perfect as I wished it were.

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