I woke up with a start in my room at the Anders, my cheeks wet from tears and throat hoarse. A few days had passed since Fane returned to Mohan Wilds. I never saw him at the house, but I felt his presence taunting me.
Was he trying to drive me crazy, wanting something I could never have?
The tonic Julia gave me hadn’t done shit to soothe my turmoil. The demon amulet still longed to take control, hoping I’d slip up one day soon. Part of me wanted to. Maybe then I wouldn’t have to feel this heartache so acutely.
My tattoo prickled as a pair of glowing crimson eyes gleamed from the shadows, and Fane emerged in his beast form.
Air caught in my lungs as his massive shape moved with a lethal grace that rivaled a jungle cat. The moonlight glinted on the onyx spikes running down his spine and protruding from his paws. As he approached my bed, I breathed deeply, realizing he wasn’t really in the room. He was projecting himself here.
“I see you figured out how to leave your body,” I said, keeping still so I didn’t reach out and touch him. “You’ve never done it in this form, though.”
“Why does my art studio smell like you?”
His voice breaching my mind for the first time since Heldrok squeezed my heart in a vise grip. Even though his tone was harsh, it was still like a caress to my soul, and I had to fight to keep the tears from brimming over.
“You also figured out how to talk into my mind,” I said.
He shook his head, brushing off my words. “Again, why is your scent all over my art studio? I go there for peace, but instead I’m reminded of the creature I’m not allowed to kill.”
“I was sleeping in it earlier.” Since his bedroom was off limits, I’d collapsed on the couch in his art room a few times, burying myself in his scent covering the cushions.
“Why?”
“Because I missed you.” Usually, I wasn’t too keen on admitting my feelings, but what was the point of lying?
He jumped on the bed, trapping me between all four paws as he leaned over me, making my pulse hammer. “You can’t miss something you never had.”
With a frustrated grumble, I struggled into a sitting position, forcing him back as our faces came inches apart. “I’ve never known you to be stupid, so don’t start now. You can’t possibly still believe we haven’t been together when an entire pack of shifters, including your family, has shown you otherwise.”
Fane snarled, his teeth so sharp they could slice my skin with hardly any effort. “You really want to antagonize a dangerous beast who wants to kill you?”
“Kill me then.”
A sound similar to a scoff burst from his mouth. “You’re really not afraid of me, are you? Even like this?” His surprise traveled through the bond, mixing with something he tried to hide.
Hope.
Everyone feared Fane’s beast, but I welcomed it. Not many people truly accepted him.
I reached out and ran my hand over the soft fur on his side and then down to one of the spikes on his paws. “I’ve faced a lot of monsters in my life, but you’re not one of them.”
“Are you sure about that?” His teeth gleamed in the moonlight from the windows.
“You’ve seen my nightmares. You tell me.” I leaned away from him and crossed my arms. “Are you like the things in them?”
His growl rattled the space around us. “Are you pushing them into my head on purpose? Do you want me to feel sorry for you?”
I scowled. “I’d rather you not see them.”
“Then why do they invade my mind every time you sleep?”
“Blame it on the bond that formed when you bit me.” I shimmied back down on the bed and rested my head on the pillow, not caring that his huge form still hovered over me.
“So it’s my own damn fault that I have this connection to my enemy?”
“Exactly.” I rolled onto my side to get comfortable. “If you want to be mad at anyone, look in the mirror. I was a raven and had my whole life mapped out when our paths crossed. You stole that future, and now you want to murder me.”
His nostrils flared as battling emotions built within him. “How am I supposed to get any sleep if your nightmares keep interrupting it?”