Page 31 of The Girl in the Woods

‘Are you all right, Laurie?’

His voice seemed far away, and then she realised he was no longer sitting opposite her. He was at the door. Was he leaving? Then she heard a click and wondered why he was locking it. Suddenly, her head felt fuzzy, like it was full of cotton wool. I need the loo, she thought and went to stand, but her legs were too heavy and wouldn’t hold her up. Instead, she ended up reeling back and falling onto the couch. Then he was there beside her, holding her hand.

She tried to say that she felt funny.

‘It’s the heat,’ he said.

‘Why did you lock the door?’ she asked, a stab of fear flaring in her stomach.

‘You looked very sexy on Friday,’ he whispered.

She pushed her hands down onto the couch and tried to get up. ‘I have to go,’ she said. ‘I don’t feel well.’

‘Here.’ He was handing her the glass of water.

It was then Laurie realised. It had been the water. He’d put something in it. That’s why she didn’t feel well. ‘What have you done?’ she asked fearfully, but she was now struggling to keep her eyes open.

‘You need some rest. You’ll feel better soon.’ He was too close, and his unfamiliar hands pulled at her skirt.

‘No, no!’ She didn’t know if the screamed words came out of her mouth or if she just thought them, but then his hand was over her mouth, silencing her. She couldn’t understand why this was happening and didn’t want to focus on the pain, thrusting and horrific violation. This couldn’t be happening. He tore into her as if she were a piece of meat, simply a thing to bear the brunt of his uncontrollable lust.

Laurie told herself she must be dreaming. If only she could think straight and get her body to move, but it didn’t feel like her body anymore. It was heavy, and she was weak and so very tired. So she closed her eyes and gave in to the overwhelming sleepiness.

Later, when she came round and saw him sitting at his desk, all she could focus on was the throbbing in her head. Then she felt the soreness between her legs and the ache in her thighs.

‘You’re awake,’ he said pleasantly. ‘Feeling better?’ he asked.

Laurie’s body shook. ‘What did you do?’ she asked, struggling to stand up.

He raised his eyebrows in surprise. ‘What do you mean? We had our session, and you kept saying you were tired, so as you were my last session, I let you sleep. This drinking has to stop, Laurie. The hangovers–’

‘I’m not hungover. You drugged me,’ she cried, tears rolling down her cheeks.

‘Laurie,’ he pleaded. ‘Don’t be ridiculous. Have some water.’

Laurie slapped the glass out of his hand and it landed with a crash on the floor. ‘Unlock the door,’ she hissed. ‘You raped me, and I’m going to the police.’

His eyes met hers, and the hard determination in them unsettled her. ‘The door is unlocked, Laurie and always has been. You should be careful what you say, Laurie. Slander is no small thing.’

‘I’m underage,’ she said, shaking so much that it felt like the floor beneath her was vibrating. ‘I was a virgin.’

‘I don’t like your accusation, Laurie. I never touched you, and you know it. I don’t know what your game is.’

‘This isn’t a game. I’m going to the police,’ she said, walking to the door.

‘Don’t forget, Laurie, that you have a reputation as a drunk, bordering on alcoholism. You come from the trashy side of town and see me to aid you in your recovery. You’re known as a bad student at school. I’m a professional with a good reputation and no hint of scandal. Who do you think they’ll believe? No one has raped you. It would be best if you didn’t make accusations like that. It’s girls like you that ruin decent men’s careers.’

Laurie’s eyes smarted. He was right. People would think she was lying or that she encouraged it. How could her judgement have been so wrong? Standing up, she felt the wetness of his semen run down her thighs. The door opened easily, and she hurried from the room without looking back.

‘Excuse me,’ called the receptionist. ‘You haven’t booked your next appointment.’

Laurie ran from the building until she reached a public toilet. She locked herself in the seedy cubicle that stank of piss, wiped her thighs clean of blood and semen, and then stuffed a large wad of toilet paper between her legs. The police station was across the road, but she knew there was no point going there. They wouldn’t believe her, a troublesome schoolgirl with a reputation for liking a good time. It would be his word against hers. She felt numb, and she didn’t want to cry, not yet.

Ignoring the soreness in her breasts, she left the loo and went home.

‘Laurie, why aren’t you at school?’ called her mum.

‘I started my period, so they sent me home. I’m going to bed.’

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