Page 205 of Guardian Daddy

“Fucking Kevin.” Rhodes was scowling. “How dare he say those things to you?”

“I’m sorry, Rhoddy,” she said in a small voice. “This is my fault.”

“It is not.” Rhodes scowled at her. “I thought we established this already. This is on Samantha and me. Not you.”

She didn’t see why Rhodes was to blame.

“But what about Kevin? Isn’t he right? I’m a liability. Am I ruining your career, Rhodes?”

Ethan moved out of the way so that Rhodes could take his place next to her. He laid his hands out and she put hers in them so he could squeeze them.

“Do not listen to Kevin,” Rhodes told her. “He’s a dick. Yeah, he’s good at his job but his people skills are shit. He had no right to say any of that to you, understand me?”

Cate nodded. But she wasn’t certain she believed it, though.

“Do you think I deserve to be with Samantha?” Rhodes suddenly asked.

She frowned, not understanding. “What do you mean?”

“Or that I deserve someone who loves me. Who wants to be with me for me, not for what I can give her. I was coasting along with Samantha, she was easy because I didn’t . . . because I knew I wouldn’t develop real feelings for her. That I could keep her at a distance. After losing Emma . . . I just, I find it hard to let myself fall for anyone else.”

“Oh, Rhoddy. You still love Emma even though she’s been dead for years?” she asked. Emma had been his girlfriend. She’d died of cancer about eight years ago. Cate should have realized that he still loved her.

“I do.”

“And so you don’t want to love someone else?”

“It feels like a betrayal of what we had.”

“But she’s dead.”

Rhodes smiled at her gently. “I know, honey. But even though she’s dead, I still love her.”

“Oh. I see. I guess I still love Mom and Dad. Death doesn’t remove the love you feel. But just because you loved Emma, doesn’t mean that you can’t love someone else, does it?”

“I don’t know. It means opening myself up to the possibility of loving and losing someone again.”

Right. She could lose Ethan. Part of her was expecting to. Because she didn’t think he could be with her forever. He didn’t even live here.

Yet, somehow, she’d forgotten that. Pushed it to one side.

And . . . she’d let herself fall in love with him.

Oh God.

48

Was she in love with him? What did love feel like? Was it this heat in your body and giddy happiness whenever you saw the other person?

Was it knowing that your life wouldn’t be the same without them in it?

Abject fear over losing them?

“Cate? Are you okay, baby?”

“Yes,” she said. “I’m just . . . this was a lot.”

Her breath came in sharper pants.

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