Page 39 of Love on the Ice

I don’t know what to do, what to say, what to think. I can’t get the image of his expression out of my mind. He was just watching me, staring at me while he used her body for his personal gratification. It was awful. Horrible in every way. And it makes me sick to even think about it.

Going through the motions, I finish my shift and then walk home in a daze. I’m not sure what to do, what to say, or who to tell. But when I arrive at my house, I pause on the sidewalk, turning and looking straight ahead at the house across the street.

All their cars are there. They’re home. Right now, all I want is a hug from Reid. I want to feel his strong arms around me, his tall body protecting me, and him making me forget that I saw what I saw.

Taking a step backward, I decide to go home. Maybe I can get something to eat if I can stomach it, shower, and climb into bed. That’s exactly what I do, too. All my roommates are doing their own things tonight, so nobody is hanging around the common areas when I let myself into the house.

I’m glad I’m alone because I’m sure that if any of them saw me, they would know something was wrong, and I don’t want to talk about it with them. I don’t know if I ever want to talk about it. But Reid seems like a safe place, even if he’s not my place.

I’m delusional. I know I am. He isn’t mine to keep.

With a plate of cheese, crackers, and grapes, I smile at my very girl dinner dinner and sink down on my bed. Taking my phone out of my pocket, I decide to open my Kindle app and read a book, but I notice I have a new notification.

It’s Reid.

A text from him.

It came in hours ago, and I frown, then remember that I felt my phone buzz in my pocket but couldn’t check it, before everything with my professor and Jill happened. I was so preoccupied that I forgot about the text.

REID: U HOME?

Sinking my teeth into my bottom lip, I worry it for a moment, trying to think of how to respond. Is it weird to reply… six hours later?

It’s late, and if I said yes, then this would definitely be booty-call territory. Although, I’m fairly certain that’s what I am, so what does it matter? I should just embrace it at this point. Plus, he makes me feel amazing and beautiful. He makes me feel wanted and desired. I’m just not sure that it’s real. No matter how much I hope it is.

My fingers fly across my screen, and I pinch my eyes closed as I press Send.

I’m home.

Chapter

Seventeen

REID

My phone buzzes, and I look down at the screen. It’s a text from Lorelai. I’m surprised it’s taken her this long to get back to me. Perhaps I should feel offended about the delay, but I also know that she’s busy working and under an extreme amount of self-induced pressure.

I begin to type a response, asking her to come over or if I can go over there, but I decide against it. I have an early morning, and I fucked up enough for today. I should make sure that I have plenty of rest for a good day tomorrow.

Plus, we have an out-of-town game this weekend. I need to make sure I’m at my best for that. But I can’t deny that being with Lorelai always makes me feel as if I’m at the top of a fucking mountain. Like I climbed it barefoot, with one hand tied behind my back.

DINNER TOMORROW?

I finally type something that I can live with. My cock wants to see her tonight, but I need my rest. It’s just too late. If I didn’t have practice, if I weren't already on Coach’s shit list, it would be completely different.

LORELAI: That sounds good.

Instead of leaving it at that, I decide to text her back.

I HOPE YOU HAD A GOOD NIGHT AT WORK.

LORELAI: It was interesting.

I frown, not sure what that means. The little bubbles on the app come up as she types another message, so I wait for her.

LORELAI: I accidentally walked in on two people having sex in a room. They were supposed to have already checked out. Weird. Interesting. Whatever you want to call it. That was my night.

I burst out laughing. I’m alone in bed, so nobody else can hear me, but the mental picture is hilarious as fuck. I feel bad she had to see that. I know she was probably red-cheeked and embarrassed.

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