Page 51 of Love on the Ice

She’s right. I’m not. But at the same time, it’s not their place to make those kinds of stipulations about me, especially to someone who none of us really knows. I hate that. They sound ridiculous. I’m an adult. I don’t need five big sisters going to bat for me and threatening this guy.

I can screw up all on my own.

And it’s clear that their warnings meant nothing anyway… and I did screw up.

Big time.

No matter how many times I told myself that I knew what was between us wasn’t going to be anything more than a booty call. And here I am, my feelings are hurt. My body aches, and my heart is broken. I was trying to avoid all this shit.

And I’ve avoided nothing.

REID

Once I’m in my room for the night, I take a long hot shower and dry off, then grab my underwear and tug it on as I make my way to the bed. Lying down, I listen for Otto, who is now in the shower, before taking my phone from the nightstand. I find Lorelai’s name in my contact list and press Call.

The phone rings, and rings, and rings before it’s sent to voice mail.

Frowning, I look at the device, then let out a grunt before I send her a text. I don’t know where she could be. She said she was going to watch the game.

Where could she be?

I don’t like the way this makes me feel at all. I want to know where she is. No, that’s not entirely true. I want her to be waiting at home for my call. I don’t care what the fuck that makes me sound like, but I want my woman waiting for me.

YOU HOME?

I send the text and sit with my back against the headboard as I wait for the three little dots to come up. Those dots do not appear. In fact, nothing appears. There is absolutely nothing. And I have no way to demand she contact me.

Staring at my phone, I will her to call me, to text me, something.

“She not responding to you?” Otto asks as he walks out of the bathroom.

“No,” I grunt as I toss my phone onto the nightstand charging pad.

“Maybe she went to bed. Maybe she went to work. Who the hell knows? Don’t get all in your head about it,” he mutters as he slips into his bed.

He turns off the lights, and I try not to stare at my phone. I silently wish for it to light up with an incoming notification. But I fail. I turn onto my side, staring at the phone, willing the light to appear, but nothing happens.

Nothing happens.

“Yeah, maybe,” I mutter.

I don’t say anything else. I’m not sure what else to say at this point. I feel like a fucking idiot. I am also pissed off and worried all rolled into one. Pressing my lips together, then roll over onto my back and shift my attention to the ceiling.

“Something isn’t right,” I mutter.

Otto stays silent, but only for a moment before I hear him clear his throat. Then he speaks. When he does, I wonder if I’ve read far too much into this shit. Maybe all of this is on me? Fuck me. I’m an asshole.

“Do you think she’s got other things going on? Maybe she’s dating someone?”

Instead of responding to him, I roll to my other side, my back to him. I don’t know what I’m doing, but it’s clear I’ve let this girl get straight into my fucking head. I should not have allowed this shit at all.

I fucked up.

Big time.

I went and fell in love with this damn girl, and she can’t even respond to a goddamn text. Anger fills me. It consumes me, and I know I have to use these feelings tomorrow in the game. I cannot let this shit control me. I have to control it all myself because if I don’t, I’ll ruin my career. And no woman is worth that.

I knew it was going to happen. Without a fucking doubt, I knew that any woman would ruin my life if I let her. This is the exact reason I don’t date. Look at me, lying in a hotel room, worried and upset that she hasn’t called me.

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