Page 15 of Destructive Truths

Her eyes close, and her breaths become louder, deeper, before finally releasing with a heavy sigh. “What happened? Tell me, and I can help you.”

“She wasn’t with me, Bev. I left her this morning, and I promised I’d be back. I told Aodhán to bring her all her stuff. She’s probably with him. At least I fucking hope she is.”

“Aodhán was here this morning. I gave him all her belongings, but I haven’t heard from him since he left. I tried his phone a few times, but he’s not picking up. Neither is Saoirse.”

“Shit.”

She’s quiet for a moment. Then her icy-blue gaze captures mine. “Please tell me what happened, Rohan. Who did this to you? And why are you so concerned about Saoirse if she wasn’t with you?”

“It’s a long story, B.”

She wants to argue with me. I can see it in the hard cut of her eyes, but she doesn’t push for whatever reason. “In all the years I’ve known you, you’ve never had this look in your eye.”

I tease my bottom lip between my teeth. “What look?”

“Fear, Rohan. You look fucking terrified.”

She’s right. For the first time in a long time, I’m losing grasp of my emotions. Knowing what my father wants me to do and what it means for the girl who holds my black heart… No lie, it scares me fucking shitless. There is no good outcome. I won’t do what Gabriel wants, even if it means I lose Saoirse in the process.

Earlier, my father asked me how far I was willing to go. At the time, I didn’t answer, I couldn’t. Because the truth petrified me.

Liam barges in, begrudgingly holding the first aid kit Beibhinn sent him to get. And as much as it chills me to the core, I know what I need to do.

How far am I willing to go? For her, as far as it fuckin’ takes.

The demon beneath my skin wages a war with the angel on my shoulder, and soon he’s choking on the pride he’s forced to swallow. Eyes locked on Liam, I force the words past my stubborn tongue. “I need your help.”

NINE

SAOIRSE

Lost in thought, I trace the raindrops with my gaze, watching as they travel down the window, blurring the thick tree-line framing the winding mountain road. The weight of unspoken words leaves a lingering heaviness neither Lorcan nor I bother to dissect. After all, how does one broach a conversation when there is so much betrayal and deceit wrapped around every moment?

The further down the mountain we descend, the more my adrenaline fades, giving way to aching muscles and weighty bones. I am exhausted—in every sense—struggling to keep swimming against the current. Every moment since I stepped foot in Killybegs has tested me, and I’m so close to breaking. Stuck on a proverbial see-saw, I fight to find the balance between the girl I once was and the girl I was born to be.

Heavy is the head that shoulders the crown, but how can I believe I am strong enough to carry the weight of the syndicate when the people around me won’t trust me with the truth?

Suddenly, the cab fills with a persistent ringing, drawing my gaze from beyond the window to the huge fancy display screen in the centre of the dashboard where two round icons flash beneath the caller’s name—a car and a Bluetooth symbol. Lorcan keeps his posture ramrod straight, but I don’t miss how his eyes dart towards the display. The ringing fades to nothing, and D. L. Devereux’s contact disappears from the screen—the call left unanswered.

Before long, the ringing starts again. With a heavy inhale, Lorcan fishes a small black earpiece from the centre console. Placing it in his ear, he clicks the Bluetooth icon, shielding me from the other half of the conversation. “Devin,”—his Northern brogue is curt—“now’s not a good time. Can I call you back?”

I strain my ears, eager to hear Liam’s response. Our date last night—at the syndicate party—seems like a lifetime ago. I feel guilty for abandoning him to dance with Rohan, but for whatever reason, I can’t resist Rí’s pull. Things with Liam got complicated. We share a childhood full of memories, but do I feel the same about him as I do Rohan? Honestly, I don’t know.

There is so much going on in my life. I haven’t had a second to figure out which way is up, let alone my feelings for the two Killybegs heirs. I planned to talk to Liam when I returned to the gate-lodge, but I never made it that far.

After Donnacha attacked me at the party, everything else vacated my mind, Liam included. Once again, I ran. Only this time, I jumped into all things Rohan, subsequently escaping reality.

Looking back on the party, and after digesting everything Rohan said about his father, I realise Gabriel distracted Liam at the bar so Donnacha could make his move without getting caught. I feel terrible for how things have played out with him, but there is something about Rohan that draws out my inner stupid.

My mind screams Liam is the logical choice. But the beating organ in my chest dances to a different tune. Before I become consumed in the green-eyed enigma that is Rohan King, Lorcan’s deep baritone pulls my focus back to the present.

“Fuckin’ hell, kid! How’s about ye?” A breath rushes from his lungs, relieving the worried furrow knitting his harsh brow. He listens intently as Liam’s inaudible mumbles travel down the line. “Aye, I have ’er. Aodhán called me.” His eyes flick toward me, scanning every inch of my face with a cautious yet tender perusal. “She’s seen better.” Lorcan’s head bobs as he processes whatever is being said. Next, his fingers tighten on the wheel, forcing the skin of his tattooed knuckles to whiten. “Don’t worry. That wee cunt has sealed his fate. Nobody messes with mine. Fuckin’ nobody.”

A grit wraps around his words, sending a shock of fear up my spine. He sounds lethal and borderline unhinged. Gone is the fun-loving guy I spent my summer nights with, and in his place is a hard-faced warrior. Suddenly, his stony gaze finds mine, and a haunted look flashes behind his eyes, stealing my breath. He’s terrifying. There is no doubt about it. This man could murder me with his bare hands and not break a sweat. But when his tight lips tug to one side, reassuring me with a softened smile. Finally, he breaks his fatherly stare and faces the road again before he continues talking. “Are you sure, kid?” Lorcan’s teeth sink into his bottom lip. “Aye. I’ll tell ’er.” Lorcan looks at me with guilt wrapped in unconditional love. Tell me what?

“We’ll be in the cabins if you change your mind. Okay, stay outta trouble.”

Too stubborn and confused about how I am feeling, I refused to break my silence and ask what’s going on. I won’t beg for the truth, not anymore. If Lorcan wants to be in my life, he needs to be more forthcoming. But that doesn’t stop my mind from running away with a thousand questions.

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