Page 34 of Never Too Late

“But there’s one thing I need to ask of you, mate.” His voice becomes more serious. I turn at a halt, giving him my full attention. “Dax thinks differently. Sometimes he does things he doesn’t understand. Sometimes he does things differently than we do. He just handles things in his own way, that’s all. And that’s okay. That’s him. I wouldn’t change anything about my brother for the world. He’s everything to me. Just please, go easy on him, yeah? I promise you; he means well. He’s so passionate and caring. He inspires me every day. But please, just go easy. He just needs some extra time.” His voice starts to break and there’s a sadness to his eyes.

The love he has for his brother is obvious.

He would do anything for Dax.

As would I.

“You have nothing to worry about, Tyler, because what you’re telling me about Dax, I already know. Things happened unexpectedly, but I don’t hold a grudge against him for it. I just want to know if he meant what he said, and if he didn’t, I want him back. If he did mean it, I’ll leave him alone.” I promise.

I accept the piece of paper he is handing me, and I turn on my heels, slowly making my way to the door. With each step I take, I feel the coldness of the air in the room, almost as though all the happiness had been sucked right out of it.

A part of me had always hoped I’d bump back into Dax, or we would meet at a different point in our lives with our souls calling to one another. But I just didn’t think it would happen so soon. Especially not like this. Especially not catching me off guard.

The other part of me should be feeling happy, I should be rejoicing, but I am instantly struck with guilt and sadness.

Would Dax want me to be here? How would he react knowing I am?

I try not to think about it too much, not allowing myself to get my hopes up or excited about something that may not even happen.

Losing Dax was bad enough the first time. How would I live if I was to lose him a second time?

Before I realise what I'm doing, my feet take off in a sprint. Aware that I’m running, stubbornly pushing through the pain, and not allowing myself to stop.

I shouldn’t be meeting Idah for another two hours yet, but being unsure of where to go or who to talk to, I decide the best place for me right now is anywhere but home.

So instead, I decide to go to the one place I’ve been so eager to make new memories of, the only place that feels safe for me to be right now. I force myself to stop, taking a moment to pause – to reevaluate the real reason I came back here. Wondering if that was the real reason at all. I wanted to heal. I wanted to forget. But instead, I’m hit with a collision of everything but those things. I need space to think, space to breathe, and space to gather my thoughts. The best place for me to do that, is the place I’ve dreamed about more than I care to admit.

The place where Dax introduced me to the stars.

Chapter nineteen

Dax

“I hope one day we’ll find our way back to one another.”

With it being my last day off, I had hoped to do absolutely nothing. Instead, I’ve found myself only being able to focus on one thing.

The metal tin sits in the corner of my room, in the same spot it’s been since I brought it home from work. My most prized possession that contains all my letters from Jae, and all the letters I should have sent him.

Letters containing my deepest and darkest secrets.

Letters containing endless hope and love.

The only things left of mine and Jae’s relationship.

It sits on the opposite side of the room, both taunting me and inviting me to open and take a look inside.

Judging me for not doing it sooner.

I hate the way I want to, but I have to stop myself each time.

Sitting on my bed, I stare at my reflection in the small mirror on my bedside table in a trance. Music blares in the background, I’m lost to everything around me when my bedroom door comes flying open and in walks Tyler with a stack of new band T-shirts for me, which must have been delivered to the shop today. He has never been interested in wearing them, but he knows they’re my favourite. Whenever a delivery comes that I haven’t put away, he always puts the ones he knows I’d like aside for me.

“Hey, D, are you feeling okay? I’m sorry for springing this on you, bro. But we’ve got to talk.” Tyler’s voice suddenly turns serious, more focused.

“Wait, let me guess. Someone’s broken in and stolen the cash register, or you’ve burnt the store down and nothing is left. Which one is it? Actually no, surprise me. I don’t know which one is worse.”

Surely nothing that bad would have happened, right?