Page 16 of The Air I Breathe

"I've wanted to ask you about that.” I take my hot dog and place it on the plate, balancing it on my knees. “What did you do to get ready for the tour, as far as cardio goes?"

She finishes her bite, using her tongue to swipe up a tiny bit of ketchup on her lips. "I took the entire set list, and anything that was remotely fast paced, I ran through it. All the slower songs, I jogged or fast walked. I started eight months before the tour, and then we worked in the choreography."

"That's so much dedication. Do you find any shows harder than others?" I take a drink of the bottled Coke I bought.

"Oh yeah, most definitely. Anything in a hot, humid climate is harder. I'm glad I live here most of the time, because it helps, but it's still hard to deal with. I try to do part of my training in a sweat suit, because it helps. I'm sure you understand." She tilts her head to the side. "At least I'm halfway naked when I perform. You have a bunch of pads on."

"Is that why you wear what you do? Because it's cooler?" I'm in awe that I'm sitting here having this conversation with her. It's one of those surreal moments when I'm not sure whether this life is actually mine or someone else's.

She smiles, her red lips breaking apart to show her white teeth. "Yeah, plus this way there's nothing for me to get caught on, when dancing or walking. I'm pretty klutzy naturally."

"So am I. I'm sure you saw the footage of me eating it while dancing in the end zone my rookie year."

She laughs loudly, throwing her head back. "I might have watched a couple of times just to see your chest bounce off the ground."

I grab my heart. "That wounds me, and it fucking hurt when it happened."

"I'm sure you'll be fine. At least your high heel didn't break on your boot in the middle of a dance move. I barely saved it. I knew if I didn't, it'd be all over social media, and I'd never hear the end of it. There have been a lot of embarrassing things that have happened to me, and that was just one of them I didn't want to see. I could imagine my head smacking the stage and losing my two front teeth." She sighs heavily. "Nightmare fuel."

I smile softly over at her. "Even with no front teeth you'd be beautiful."

She closes her eyes and scoffs. "You're so good for my ego."

"That's what I'm here for, baby."

She tosses a French fry in my direction as we smile at each other. I swallow heavily. I've had my fair share of relationships, but Willa? This shit is easy right here, and that's scary as fuck, but I'm going to lean into it and allow whatever this is to develop.

Chapter Twelve

Willa

I lean back, holding tightly to my stomach. "Oh my God, I haven't eaten that much food in almost a year. I feel like I could throw up."

"Worth it though?" he asks, his eyebrow raised.

"Totally worth it. I'd do it again tomorrow night if I didn't have to be in the recording studio."

He takes a drink of his water. "Are you doing something new?"

I contemplate if I'm going to tell him. Not many people know my plans, and I've managed to keep them on the down-low. There isn't a lot I've been able to keep to myself since I started in this business, but this? I have.

"You don't have to tell me." He holds up his hand like a stop sign. "I was just trying to make conversation. Not trying to get information from you."

"I know." I take a drink of my Coke. "This is just something that no one else knows about. It's not like I'm contractually obligated not to say anything, but I'm trying to keep my nose clean, and not start any drama, or get any rumors started before I drop this info."

"You can trust me." He puts his hand on his chest, over his heart. "I've been burned by the press and rumors too. Not like you, obviously, but it was enough to make things difficult when I was trying to concentrate on doing what I needed to do in order to work."

In the back of my mind, I remind myself he doesn't have to use me to make himself popular. He's already got the fans in his own right. He doesn't want to keep me hidden, just because I have a lot that comes with me. In fact, I think he'd be willing to be seen with me right this minute if I asked him to. I'm trying to protect my peace because there are people who have purposely tried to destroy it. The only way I'm going to know if I can trust him is if I choose to do so with this information.

"I’m thinking of doing a rock album, and I’m going to lay down a few tracks to see how it sounds. My old record company wasn’t completely behind it, because Mercer was my producer, and he told them that there was no way I could do it." I blow out a breath. “He’s still doing it, and he’s pretending that it’s because he cares so much about my damn career, when he’s worried I’ll be smarter than he ever was. The new company is giving me a chance. I’m going to go in the studio and cut two song, see what happens.”

Blake whistles. "Are you serious?"

"Yeah, I have these angry songs that won’t fit into America’s Sweetheart, and I want to give them a shot, ya know? These callouses"—I show my hands to him—"are from chords that have made up both the pop hits, and these angry songs. It pisses me off that I can’t let every faucet of myself out there. I want to give it a try and see what happens. Who knows, maybe I’ll get in there and realize this isn’t me.”

"So you’re really gonna do it?" he confirms, kicking his feet out in front of the couch.

"Yeah, I have a new record company since Mercer and I broke up. They don’t listen to him as much as my old one did. He’s slightly older than me, and he has a reputation for being a musical genius, so my previous company wanted me to bow down to him. This one, doesn’t kiss his ass as much.” I smile, thinking about how the head of the company had come in and told me they would allow me to try a few things out. It was truly one of the first times someone in a position of power believed me.

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