Page 64 of Always Been You

When Jess entered the room, the door shut behind her and he winced at the sound. She stepped closer and as her face came into focus he saw that she'd been crying. Her cheeks were tearstained and the aqua blue of her irises were even brighter than normal thanks to the red rim around them. Seeing the pain that she was in caused his already broken heart to shatter even more. Any piece that had been in tact was obliterated when he looked into her eyes.

She put on a brave face though. If not for her puffy, red-rimmed eyes, he would’ve never guessed that she'd been emotional.

"Wow. You sure went to a lot of trouble just to get out of dancing with me,” she quipped.

"Sorry.” His lips curled at the edges.

Only Jess could make him smile at a time like this.

"Don't be sorry. Your plan to get out of it didn't work. We will do that dance, even if it's in my backyard for my parents. I worked too hard getting that damn thing down. Plus, a deal’s a deal."

Ethan had heard the term a sight for sore eyes before but he'd never truly understood what that meant until this moment. Jess's hair was in soft waves that framed her beautiful face. She was wearing a dress that showcased her cleavage and highlighted her pinched in waist.

"You look beautiful."

"Thanks, you look..."

"Like shit," Ethan filled in the blank.

"No." She shook her head, her face somber. "I've seen shit that looked a lot better than you."

He appreciated that she was trying to make him laugh, but he wasn't in the mood. He didn’t want to smile or be happy. He didn’t want to talk to or see anyone. Especially Jess. After what happened to Carter and seeing the pain and fear in her tearstained face, Ethan knew there was no future for the two of them. He loved her too much to put her through what Lori was going through.

"Thanks for stopping by."

"Are you kidding me? This is the most sought-after ticket in town. There's a waiting room full of people wanting to get in here, but I was the chosen one because I'm your girlfriend."

"No. You're not."

And for the first time in his life, Ethan was glad that was the case.

The cold, detachment in Ethan's tone hit her like a slap in the face. He'd never spoken to her like that. He'd also never tried to get rid of her. That was usually her M.O.

This was the third time recently when her life had done a Freaky Friday and she’d ended up playing the role that was usually cast opposite her. First it was taking care of Ali, then it was Ethan not returning her messages and calls, and now Ethan didn’t want her here. She was not a fan of this new storyline.

Okay, Universe, I get it. She hoped that admission would be enough to return everything to normal, but she wasn’t holding her breath.

“You’re not my girlfriend,” he reiterated.

"Well, the folks in the waiting room don't know that so I'm just gonna pull up a chair and sit my butt down in it for the appropriate amount of time that a girlfriend would." She did just that. "That is, if it's okay with you, RGF?"

Ethan's only answer was to shut his eyes, which she chose to interpret as a yes.

Jess knew that Ethan wanted her to leave. She knew what it was like to be the one in that bed, wanting to be left alone. And maybe conventional wisdom would dictate that because of her experience she should respect his wishes.

Too bad for Ethan, she didn't live her life conventionally.

She leaned back against the chair and took a breath, happy to have a moment to collect herself and recover from the shock of seeing him like this. She wasn't sure what she'd expected to see when she walked in, but whatever it was hadn't prepared her for the reality of what Ethan in a hospital bed would look like. She'd thought the bruise on his ribs was bad. But seeing him like this was next-level terrifying.

A single tear rolled down her face. From what Ethan's captain had told Daisy, he'd done everything right. He'd protected the target at the risk of his own life. And his partner had done the same. But his partner hadn’t made it.

Jess felt a stabbing pain of guilt that she'd been relieved when the doctor had come out with a grave expression and walked towards Carter's wife and not Daisy. She shouldn't have been relieved that he hadn't been updating them about Ethan, but she was. At the same time she was devastated for Lori and the girls.

Another tear fell down Jess's cheek as she stared at Ethan's scraped-up face, the IV in his hand, the bandage peeking out of his hospital gown. It was hard to believe that just twenty-four hours ago she'd been waiting for him to come over after her naughty text.

She’d peeked through her curtains and watched him walk up her porch steps, taking two at a time, looking larger than life. She remembered thinking that he looked every bit the part of the superhero that his dad had predicted he’d be when he talked about his origin story. He was dominant, powerful, and indestructible.

Now, as she gazed down at him, the fragility of his life was all she could see.

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