Page 63 of Burden to Bear

My feet carried me out of the garage, my legs powering me toward Mia. She’d gotten her mail and was back in her car by the time I stepped out of the garage. And when she opened her garage door to pull her car in, I was already walking along her driveway.

Mia parked and stepped out of her car. She made her way to the back hatch of her SUV, glanced up, and saw me making my approach. “Oh, Brock. Hey. Is everything alright?”

“I was going to ask you the same thing,” I returned. “You missed our meeting at the mailbox an hour ago.”

Pulling open the hatch, she apologized. “I’m so sorry. I made a last-minute decision while I was at work today. I thought I’d go to the grocery store after work, since we don’t usually walk on Thursdays.”

“I thought you normally tried to go on the weekend.”

“I do, but I’m heading back home this weekend to see my family,” she explained. “Actually, despite telling her it wasn’t necessary, my mom insisted on throwing a baby shower for me. They were going to come here to do it to make it easier on me, but since most of my extended family is there, I figured it was just better for me to be the one to travel. And as much as you know I’ll love the party, I’m sure I’ll be far too tired when I get back late Sunday afternoon to make a run to the store.”

“That makes sense,” I said, hating that she’d be gone most of the weekend, but happy she was going to have this time with her family. Turning my attention to the back of her vehicle, I noticed there was more than just grocery bags there. “Mia, what’s all this?”

She laughed. “Oh, you probably think I’m an absolute mess. I’ve been picking things up occasionally when I’m out, but by the time I get home, I’m usually too tired to bring any of it inside. Then I forget about it until the next time I open the door, and there’s too much there to carry, so it never gets taken out and carried into the house.”

“Why don’t you take a bag now and head inside? I’ll grab the rest and bring it in for you,” I said.

Her head dropped to one side, and she smiled. “That’s very sweet of you. I hope you know I didn’t tell you why the back of my car is full just so you’d carry everything inside for me.”

Considering the relief I felt knowing that she was okay and nothing bad had happened, there wasn’t much I wouldn’t have done for her right now. Truthfully, I had a feeling I told her to head inside and let me handle the rest for her, because I needed to do something to calm myself down. Sure, I’d had a few minutes to stand close and talk to her, to confirm she was okay with my own two eyes. I still felt slightly worked up about her, and in an effort not to put my hands on her by pulling her in for a hug that she’d surely think I was crazy for, keeping them busy was my only option.

“I know you didn’t intend for that, but I’m more than happy to do it for you,” I said. Jerking my head toward the house, I urged, “Go inside, and let me take care of this for you.”

Her voice was just a touch over a whisper when she replied, “Thank you, Brock.”

I shook my head slightly, attempting to brush it off and stop myself from sharing the truth about how I felt today.

That was something I was noticing was becoming more and more difficult to contend with as time passed. It had been a few weeks since I spent the day building a crib and watching movies with Mia, and the feelings I had for her weren’t diminishing. Whenever I was around her, I never wanted it to end. Whenever she wasn’t around, I found myself constantly thinking about her.

I’d been debating about whether to tell her how I felt for her, but I was worried I’d ruin what we had now if the feeling wasn’t mutual. In my mind, it was better to have what I did than to have nothing at all.

And I guess there was a part of me that wasn’t sure it was fair for me to reveal how things had changed for me with her when she was already dealing with so much change in her life. The last thing I wanted was to become a source of stress and contention for her.

Luckily, I didn’t need to worry I’d slip up and say something now, because Mia grabbed two lighter bags and carried them into her house.

I followed behind her with a few more. Then I made several additional trips in and out of the house as I emptied the back of her vehicle, wishing that one day I’d get to do this because she was mine.

It was the last weekend of June, and it was safe to say that summer had arrived.

Not only were we a few days past the official first day of summer, but the recent weather had indicated we were in the thick of it, too.

Because it was hot.

Hotter than I ever remembered it being at this point in the year.

And it had been that way for the last week or so. Recognizing the weather would be unbearable as the day progressed and knowing I needed to get a few things done around the outside of the house, I decided to wake up early and get out before the sun was blazing.

I’d mowed, weed whacked, and trimmed the shrubs all before the outdoor temperature got too hot and intolerable. I had some projects to take care of in my workshop for a few locals this weekend, and I’d be much cooler working in the garage than out in the sun during the peak heat of the day.

That’s why I was here now with the fans running and the windows open. It wasn’t the same as being in the air conditioning, but I wasn’t directly in the sun, and there was a nice breeze blowing in the shop.

Whenever my machines weren’t running, I couldn’t help but notice the sounds of summer were all around me, too.

Not just with birds chirping, kids playing, or a neighbor’s dog barking, but I couldn’t miss the unmistakable sounds of my fellow neighbors getting their yard work accomplished. Someone was using a chain saw in the neighborhood, and I could only let out a sigh of relief that I’d been smart about doing things like that in the fall.

Just as I was about to start running a machine to finish the work on a custom bracket for someone, I heard a lawnmower just a little bit too close. I moved over to the window, looked out, and saw Mia was cutting her grass.

I’d been doing my best for weeks not to overstep, but my blood was boiling every time I saw her doing things she shouldn’t have been doing.