Page 27 of Nothing Without You

Anger filled Evie as she looked from one to the other. ‘What? You’re going to just talk this morning as if everything is normal?’ Words laced with sarcasm flowed, without her even having to think about what she wanted to say. ‘After everything last night, this morning is just, oh, a cup of tea, Carlo? Yes, thank you, Maya. Perhaps Dad, you should have added your usual, you look lovely this morning. Why don’t you kiss each other and ….’

Her mother cut Evie’s words short. ‘That will do, Evie. I know last night was difficult for you, well, all of us, but your father and I talked for a long time this morning before you got up, and now we need to discuss our plans with you.’

Pushing her bowl, which was still filled with cornflakes, into the middle of the table, Evie glared out the window, pretending she was watching something outside.

Her father reached out and put his hand on her arm. She quickly pulled away. ‘You’re obviously both good at playing happy families. I can pretend if I have to. I don’t really care. I don’t care about anything.’

Her father’s voice was full of emotion, and her own heart cracked a little at the sound of his words. ‘Please Evie. Your mother and I can no longer pretend.’

Don’t give in to him, she told herself. He has betrayed you and lied to everyone. She was surprised at the venom in her voice. ‘Really. You’ve both been doing a good job so far.’ She folded her arms and continued to look out the window.

‘Evie, please look at me,’ her father pleaded, his voice trembling with emotion. ‘I know this is hard for you, but your mother and I want to be honest. No more lies.’

When she turned to look at him, she burst into tears, the sight of his face with tears streaming down his cheeks too much to bear. She stood up and went to him, and he wrapped his arms around her as she bent down and rested her head on his shoulder. They stayed like that for a long while until he gently wrapped his hands around her face and looked into her eyes. His eyes were so dark, and she could read the misery within their depths.

She wanted to be a little girl again, for him to take her in his arms and sit her on his lap. She sighed. She was no longer a child. ‘Please Dad, don’t be so sad. Please don’t cry.’ Wiping her own tears, she stood leaning against him, his arm around her waist. ‘This is a big shock for me.’ Looking at her mother she added, ‘Both parts of it.’

Eventually she returned to her chair, and her mother put a cup of tea down in front of her. Her words were gentle and calm, surprising Evie after the emotional conversations last night. ‘Most parents wouldn’t discuss this with their fifteen-year-old daughter. But because it is just the three of us, and you are now a young woman, we want to be honest with you. Your father and I have been living a lie for most of our marriage. We have decided that neither of us is to blame, but we should've been honest about this a long time ago.’ She sat down on the other side of Evie. ‘Your father thought he could get married to me and pretend to be like everyone else. Married and happy.’

Dad leaned forward. ‘I did love your mother, Evie. Well, I still love her. You must believe that. But I don’t love her in the usual way. She is my friend and companion but … I can’t love women like other men might.’

He passed a handkerchief to Evie and she pressed it against her eyes, the tears still threatening to spill. ‘We had you and we were both happy for a while.’ Mother’s voice became shaky. She had to have a couple of sips of tea and use a handkerchief before continuing. ‘But we both knew something wasn’t right. Your father didn’t love me like a wife, and I guess,’ she turned and looked at Carlo, ‘I guess that sent me looking for the sort of love I wasn’t getting. When I met David, I fell in love with him, and he with me. I thought I could leave with him and start a new life, and you would stay here with your father, going back and forth between the two of us, once I got settled.’ She took a deep breath. ‘But now, that won’t be happening.’

Evie felt a glimmer of hope that life might continue with some sort of normality. ‘So, are we just going to stay here and carry on like before? I won’t tell anyone. I can keep it a secret.’

Her heart sank with her father’s response. ‘Neither of us can stay here. I need to be in Sydney and live my life as I want. I can’t do that here. And your mother no longer wants to stay in Beaudesert. It’s too difficult for her.’

‘What! I can’t live here by myself!’

Nobody spoke. Evie wanted to throw her mug at the clock on the wall, the incessant ticking of its second hand seeming to be a metaphor for what was approaching. Her time for happiness and life as she knew it, was running out.

Mother sat up straight and pushed her hair back behind her ears. ‘You and I will move, Evie. I have a friend in North Queensland who has a house she wants to rent out. I only spoke to her last week and I rang her again this morning. We can move there. You can finish your last two years of school at the local high school there. Once you’ve completed your schooling, you can move back to Brisbane to go to university.’

‘What?’

‘Your father and I have spoken about what will work for all of us, and this will be the best option. It’s too difficult for either of us to remain here. This way we can sell the house and move on with our lives. We’ll stay in touch, and you can go on holiday to Sydney.’

‘What about the vacuum cleaner business?’

‘For a while I have had a big firm from Melbourne pestering me to sell to them. I can easily do that, which will give us more money. Your mother and I have agreed there will be no nastiness or trouble with any of this. We want to make sure you are looked after.’

Evie laughed, a cynical chuckle that split the air in the room. ‘You didn’t seem to worry about me before all of this. It doesn’t sound like what I think, matters. Sure, let’s move. Take me away from my friends and everything I know. What does it matter?’ She had nearly added, away from my boyfriend, but didn’t.’

‘Maybe you can still stay in contact with Chris,’ her mother said. ‘I know you’re close to each other.’

‘No. I’m not close to him. I don’t care if I see him ever again. In fact, I’m happy to move away from here. It’s a shithole.’

‘Please don’t swear.’ Her father shook his head. ‘We hope this works for everyone. For your mother and I, it means no more lying or living a life that isn’t what we want.’

‘We will all get through this,’ her mother said. ‘It’ll be okay.’

Chapter Twenty-Five

Evie managed to walk down her street and into the corner store without bumping into anyone she knew. She stood impatiently as Mrs Tyler, the lady behind the counter, counted her change. The last thing she wanted to do was walk around the neighbourhood, but Father had persisted until she gave in. Surely it wasn’t too much to ask that she go and get some Aspirin? They were both busy working out the finer details of their plans, and Mother needed some relief from a thumping headache.

When Mrs Tyler asked how Maya was, Evie must have looked shocked. ‘Oh dear, is she alright?’ Mrs Tyler asked, clutching the packet of Aspirin in her hand. Evie wanted to reach out, snatch the packet from her, and quickly exit the store. But instead she smiled, reassuring the nosy shopkeeper. ‘Yes, she’s fine. Just a bit of hay fever, and the Aspirin will fix that.’

With that, she took the packet and turned to walk out of the shop. As she made her way towards the doorway, she hoped like crazy there wouldn’t be anyone from school in the street. It was early, and being Saturday morning, most kids would be sleeping in or watching Bandstand on TV. When she pushed through the plastic strands that hung from the shop doorway, she looked ahead and her heart leapt into her throat. She stood on the top step of the shop. Two steps down on the concrete footpath in front of her, stood Chris.

---