Page 22 of Nothing Without You

She didn’t have much experience with sex. Well really, she’d had no real involvement with the actual process. Certainly not the part that was taking place above her now. The only details she knew were from, of course, Layla and then a stupid book her mother had given her called ‘The Birds and the Bees.’

‘End of conversation,’ her mother had said last year, as she passed the book to Evie and instructed her to read it. ‘If you need to know anything else, you can ask your father.’ Of course, she did not ask any questions. She was close to her father, but that was not the sort of thing daughters and fathers talked about. That topic was taboo, only discussed at school with friends, or at parties when couples disappeared into the bush or the back of a car.

Could her mother get pregnant at this age she wondered? What was going to happen if her father found out? And what about Chris’s mother? She took a sharp intake of breath. Bettina.

Thinking about all of those added complications stole Evie’s focus away from what was happening above, just for a moment. Now the bed was still, and she tried not to imagine what the two of them lying inches just above her looked like together. Her mother was thirty-five and Mr McIntosh was probably about forty. Old. Too old to have sex. She took the Jaffa out of her ear and lifted her head as they started to talk. Mostly it was Mr McIntosh talking, her mother giggling and muttering love words as he …, yuck, too much, she thought.

‘You love being touched here, don’t you?’ Mr McIntosh said, the bed creaking as he moved above.

Her mother made a noise, as if she was in pain. ‘I do. I don’t think we should go again though.’ As the bed sagged above her, Evie imagined her mother leaning over and looking at the clock radio. ‘We don’t have time. There’s only half an hour ‘til Evie gets home.’

The bed was still, his voice husky. ‘I’m so glad I took the afternoon off. This could be the last time we meet like this, in secrecy.’

They’d done this before? Here in her mother’s bed while Evie was at school? Surely not!

She listened harder.

Her mother’s voice purred. ‘Well, tonight’s the night. Carlo will be home by five, and I won’t wait another second. By seven o’clock he’ll know, and I will stand by my decision. Evie will be fine living with him. The two of them are close, and he’s a better father than I am a mother.’

I’m going to break it to Bettina at exactly six o’clock. We always have dinner at that time, so Chris and the girls will be there.’ He stopped for a long while, then she heard a match strike, the acrid smell causing her to wrinkle her nose. She pinched her nostrils quickly between her fingers. Between the dust and now the smoke that started to filter through the room, she prayed, even though she wasn’t religious, that she wouldn’t sneeze.

‘It’s the right thing to do. We can’t go on like this. The car is full of fuel and my bag is packed,’ Mr McIntosh said. I’ll be waiting just up the road for you at half past seven. If we time this right, both breaking the news and then just leaving, well…’ he paused again, and Evie could hear him blowing smoke out of his mouth.

Her mother finished the sentence. ‘We’ve waited a long time for this night. I’ve rung ahead and the motel for the first night is reserved. After that, we’ll book rooms as we travel, until we get to where we’re going.’

‘I have enough money to last a few months, but it will be easy to pick up work.’

‘I love you.’

‘I love you too,’ he replied.

Evie let herself sink back into the dust. She lay on her back with her eyes closed. Her entire world was crashing down around her. Her mother had been having an affair for years, and now she was going to leave Evie, and her father, for … David McIntosh.

His voice made her jump. ‘Bettina is going to get nasty about this. You know what she’s like. She’s become a terrible person over the years, and I should have left a long time ago. You and I have both done the right thing though, waiting until the kids are old enough to handle it.’

‘It’ll be okay. Everything will fall into place. Carlo will probably be relieved. There’s been nothing between us since the night we made Evie. I’d say he’s finding romance somewhere else, and has been for a long time.’

‘How will your Evie go?’ he asked.

It took a long while for her mother to answer, and when she did Evie could tell she was upset, her voice quivering as it usually did just before she cried. ‘I can’t put my life on hold any longer. I’ve waited this long, and once we get settled, I’ll ring her and perhaps she can come and visit, or I’ll visit her. I don’t think Carlo will get nasty like your Bettina will. He’s a good man, it’s just there’s nothing between us.’

It sounded as if they were sharing the cigarette, and bile rose in her mouth at the thought that they were still lying naked above her, their clothes lying on the floor, evidence that they had nothing on. ‘You know, I thought Evie and your Chris were an item, or might become so,’ her mother said. Evie’s ears pricked up when Mr McIntosh laughed.

‘I don’t think so. He’s with that Geraldine girl with the red hair. They’re as tight as anything. Can’t say I blame him. She’s a good-looking girl, well-built, and a bit older. They’re always up in his room, and I’d say she’s teaching him a few things. It’s always when Bettina isn’t home. I tend to ignore it. Sowing his wild oats. I must say though, the upstairs floor often shakes. They must have sex on the rug up there, although sometimes I hear the bed going also, like this,’ He moved up and down and the bed squeaked loudly. Her mother and Mr McIntosh laughed, which was just as well as Evie wasn’t sure if a noise came out of her mouth. She blinked hard and tried to stop the tears from coming.

The bed stopped moving and her mother spoke quietly. ‘We need to get going. It’s only a matter of hours until we’re together forever.’

Evie could tell they were kissing again, but now she didn’t care what they did. Let them go for it again. What did she care? For the second time in an hour, she felt like the earth had tilted under her, and her head ached as tears slid down her cheeks. The drops made marks in the dust, and she watched the dust disappear under the wetness.

Her attention was jolted back to what was happening above her. Her mother’s feet suddenly appeared as she placed them on the floorboards. Next to them, were his. Gritting her teeth, she wished they would both leave. Only then could she put those last words he had spoken into perspective.

She watched as they picked up their clothes. ‘I do love that perfume you wear. Make sure you bring that with you,’ he said.

‘Which one?’ her mother asked. ‘I haven’t used my Charlie perfume for a couple of weeks. I’ve been saving it for when we leave.’

They moved away from the bed towards the hallway, and she could see a bit more of their bodies as Mr McIntosh wrapped his arms around her mother, his hand clenching her bottom. She closed her eyes, the picture of their nakedness firmly imprinted in her memory forevermore. They kissed for a long while, before her mother grabbed his hand and led him into the bathroom, the door closing firmly behind them.

Not waiting a second longer, Evie rolled out from under the bed, tiptoed out of the bedroom and down the hallway. It was hard to ignore the noises coming from the shower. Her stomach rolled with nausea at the thought of the two of them having sex again in the same place where she and her father also showered. She glanced back at the bed, the sheets and ruffled quilt half lying on the floor. It was best to get out now, in case her mother decided to make the bed before she left. No doubt she would do that, and apart from Evie, her mother and Mr McIntosh, no one else would ever know what had taken place.

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