Page 239 of Unexpected Hero

Attempting to distract myself, I lock my system, powering down what I can, and head to the gym on the first floor. Physical exertion should help me silence the madness clouding my mind.

But is it really madness if I’m losing her? Something tells me the end I always knew was coming has arrived.

You’re always going to be alone.

Once she goes, I’ll be vacant again. The Tin Man.

By the time I jump on the treadmill, she’s sent a two-word reply.The last two words I want to hear.

Sugar Bear

I’m fine.

Fuck.

We all know what that means — she’s anything but fine.

Usually, when this happens, I ask her to tell me what I did wrong. And she does. After I apologize, we move on with my lesson learned. We both know I’ll fuck up again in the future, but rarely do I make the same mistake twice.

Yet today, she’s stonewalling me.

Unfortunately, until I talk to her in person, I don’t have a chance in hell of fixing it. Whatever it is. So many options for her to choose from.

I bet it was the Plan B. Why, though? Is it a religious thing? Did she think I was trying to force her? I wasn’t.

Like always, I must have done a shit job communicating my intentions.

My father’s voice rings clearer and more insistent than it has for months.

You’re such a freak.

No one could love you, boy.

Even your mom left you.

I bat that last thought away because I know the truth. My mom did not leave me.

That was one of his lies.

He knew exactly what happened to her. Because he’s the one who did it.

Unfortunately, the other things he said are harder to brush off. Especially when the proof of his words begins to pile up.

My feet pound out five miles in thirty-eight minutes before I power through strength training like I’m gunning for personal bests.

When my father’s voice starts overpowering the music in my earbuds, I hit the locker room for a cold shower. The shock of the freezing water on my overheated skin is enough to drown out his memory.

I barrel out of Redleg a few minutes later. The entire drive home, I attempt to talk myself out of checking up on Lettie.

But let’s face it. I’m too much of a mess to resist.

I’m weak without her.

My gut is twisted in a hundred knots. Is this the feeling that Leo and Big Al get? Is that why it’s called a gut instinct?

Back in the service, they always knew seconds before something was about to get FUBAR. That’s exactly how I feel tonight.

Maybe it’s not Lettie. Maybe something is wrong with Big Al or Leo.

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