“Alright, bye, baby.”
We hang up, and I stand, worried, when Lucas still doesn’t show.
“Lucas,” I call, “what did mommy say about staying where I can see you?”
He pops his head around, and the clenching in my stomach immediately loosens. “Sorry!” But when he steps out and zooms back towards me, an unfortunate sight follows.
Brad.
I groan, and immediately pull my phone back out to text Oli and let him know. It’s so instinctive I don’t even think about it. I get an immediate reply.
I’m coming.
Lucas barrels into my legs, and I touch his head. “Ready to go home?”
He doesn’t put up a fuss, simply nodding up at me, and I start to text Oli not to come to my rescue, when Brad interrupts before I finish.
“Pookie,” he calls out. “Pookie, wait!”
I scowl at him over my shoulder as he jogs to catch up. “Go home, Brad.”
“You are my home!”
“God…” I mutter, popping my phone away and bending to swing Lucas into my arms so I can walk faster. I’ll text Oli in the car.
“Gracie,” Brad cries as he darts in front of me in a flurry. “Please, I miss Lucas. Please.”
My footsteps falter, and I let out a long, long sigh. “Do you, Brad? Do you miss him? Or are you just blurting out anything you can think of and running with whatever manipulates me best?”
He gasps, his hand actually fluttering to his chest dramatically as if this was some sort of performance. “I would never—”
“Save it,” I snap. “There’s no direction this conversation could take that will end with you getting your way. I don’t love you anymore. Please, just leave me and my son alone.”
He opens his mouth to argue, but Lucas stirs in my arms first, speaking quietly. “Mamma, I thought you said love was forever.”
I purse my lips, my heart breaking in sadness and anger both that my poor Lucas has to be dragged into the middle of all this. “It does, baby. But sometimes, you think you love someone when really, they’re no good for you. Sometimes people need to part ways, for the good of everyone involved.”
“Does that mean that one day, maybe you’re not gonna love me anymore? Like if I’m not a good boy?”
My eyes immediately sting with tears, and I hug both my arms tightly around him. “Never,” I whisper fiercely. “Mommy will never stop loving you, no matter what happens, ever. I love you more than everything.”
“I still love you just like that, too, Pookie,” Brad interrupts, and I immediately shoot him a watery glare. “And Lucas. He’s like a son to me.”
I close my eyes and inhale deeply, letting the sweet scent of my boy calm me as I try to center the sudden overwhelm of emotions hitting me.
“Gracie, please, can’t we talk?”
“There’s nothing to talk about,” I say. ‘Like a son’ my ass. For the past few years, I’ve practically had to beg him to put down his games and spend time with Lucas. “There is no more us.”
“But there’s still Lucas,” Brad replies. “Maybe… Maybe we can just talk about him?”
I kiss Lucas’s cheek and gently put him down. “What’s there to talk about? It’s not as if you suddenly want visitation rights—”
His eyes widen, and he nods enthusiastically and jumps in. “Yes! That’s exactly what I want. Let’s go and talk about that.”
I frown, because my gut doesn’t believe he’s being genuine, but before I can say anything else he’s already grabbed a suddenly stiff Lucas and hauled him up into his arms. Somewhere in the back of my mind, half-formed and quiet, a little voice inside me points out how uncomfortable, uninterested, and unhappy Lucas looks with Brad’s arms around him.
And how he acts in the exact opposite way, lighting up like a Christmas tree, whenever Oli comes near.