Page 34 of Back the Blue

And as much as I want to admonish her for her actions right now, I don’t. Because they very well could have saved her life. I’ll just have to wait until she’s ready to explain things before I decide for myself. Then we’re going to have one serious come-to-Jesus about her safety and how important it is to me if we’re going to have a life together.

Something that I now know I want more than anything.

Twenty-Three

Ashley says nothing while we drive away in the SUV. As I burrow into his chest, he just holds me nice and tight. I can feel that he’s tense, and I suppose he has every right to be after I ghosted him. But I had no choice. I stay quiet until we arrive back at the FBI building. Once we’re parked, Ashley sighs and pats my back.

“Come on,” he says softly. “Let’s get you comfortable so we can talk.”

I nod and let him pull me out. This time, though, he wraps his arm around my shoulders. And I don’t hesitate to wrap myself around his waist. As we walk inside, I keep my eyes lowered and let him guide me along. We go the the third floor and down two different hallways. Just before he pushes open a door for us, a familiar voice calls out.

“Hughes.”

I lift my head as Ashley looks down at me. He arches his eyebrow in question, and I nod. Then he kisses my forehead and turns toward Director Jackson as he stops in front of us. His focus is on me, and he looks concerned.

“Are you all right, Miss Lewis?”

“I’ll be fine now, thank you,” I tell him.

He glances at Ashley, then back at me.

“Take all the time you need,” he says. “The rest of Hughes’ team is already tracking Diamond again.”

I nod. He manages a small smile and nods back. Then he pats Ashley on the shoulder and walks away. Ashley doesn’t hesitate to turn us back to the door and let us inside. It’s just a small bunk room with a desk, a double bed, and an adjoining bathroom. Before I can say anything, he lifts me into his arms and carries me to the bed. As soon as I’m on my back, his body is on mine. A sob leaves me, but it’s quickly swallowed by his deep kiss.

As always, I welcome it. Especially after what happened earlier. And I give him back everything I can until he finally breaks contact. Then he rests his forehead on mine and exhales as his hands clench around my face.

“God dammit, Lorna,” he chokes out. “Don’t you ever fucking do that to me again.”

“I’m sorry,” I whisper. “But…I had no choice. And besides…you told me to.”

This stills him. Then he slowly lifts his head and locks eyes with me. The pain I see there pains me as well.

“What?” he breathes.

He may not believe me, but I’m going to tell him the truth anyway.

“I wanted to wait up for you,” I tell him. “But I fell asleep in my clothes. The next thing I know, the phone was ringing. I scrambled off the bed to answer it. As soon as I spoke your name, you screamed at me to get the fuck out of there.”

“But I never called you,” he says.

“I know,” I nod. “As soon as I slammed the phone down, I woke up in a cold sweat. Then I jumped up and looked out the window. And that’s when I saw him. So…I just…ran.”

He slams his eyes shut and buries his face in my neck. I wrap my arms around him as far as I can, needing to feel grounded. And I do. Until I feel the first drop of wetness on my skin. Then his arms band around me like a vice. His hold on me is so tight, I can barely breathe. But when he starts to speak, I can’t complain. And I don’t.

“I don’t know how to feel right now,” he chokes out. “I’m elated that you’re okay, but I’m fucking pissed as hell that you ran from him. He could have caught you and God only knows what he would have done to you, then. And I’m…I’m not ready to find out what life is like without you after just having found you, Lorna.”

His words do something no other man has done before; they capture my heart. And I become his in that moment. After a pained sob, I manage to choke out a few words of my own, wanting to do anything I can to soothe him.

“I’m sorry,” I sob. “I was so confused after I woke up and then when I saw…him…I thought it was the best thing to do. And I didn’t want to call you because I didn’t want to compromise myself any further and I just…I’m sorry, Ashley. I swear, I’ll do whatever you think is best from now on. No arguments. I promise. I swear it…because…I want a life with you, too.”

His entire body stills at this, but his hold doesn’t lessen. Instead, he just barely turns his head until his mouth is at my ear. The feel of his breath there sends chills down my spine. And he delivers some more words that solidify his place in my heart and my life.

“I’m going to hold you to that, Lorna Lee Lewis,” he says darkly. “And if you defy me, I’m going to punish you…with pleasure. Because as far as I’m concerned, from this moment on, you’re mine. Wholly and completely. And as soon as I can, I’m going to make it official.”

“Ashley,” I pant. “God, you’re making me wet.”

“Oh, sweetheart,” he growls as he lifts his head to look at me. “I’m going to make you so much more than wet.”

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