Page 36 of Smoke and Mirrors

He looks over his shoulder at me as I close the door behind him, making sure the lock’s flicked securely before I allow myself to drop to my knees and shatter. The tears flow freely as I sob, gasping for air but feeling like it’s just out of reach.

Because it left with him, leaving me broken and suffocating.

Chapter Eleven

KACE

As the door closes behind me, my stomach sinks while my chest heaves. The guys look at me and shake their heads as the soft sobs of Lily echo through her door. The ache in my chest is almost crippling as I remember her face and how hurt and confused she looked. I know what I do is crazy and well, an unbelievable occupation, but I told her the truth.

I’m an Operative, and I’m one of the good guys. I just hope, in time, she can see me for who I really am, and that my darkness doesn’t drown her. Because she’s the only good thing I have right now, and losing her will mean I’ll sink back into the black abyss. I’ve got blood on my hands, and I can’t honestly say I know that innocent people haven’t lost their lives in the crossfire. I can’t say that every mission we’ve been on was successful, that we hadn’t lost civilians, team members, friends, family. I can tell myself every day that what I’m doing is for the good of my country, for the people around me who continue to live their lives in peace because of our operation. I can try to justify what we’ve done, think about the lives we’ve altered, the ones we’ve saved. But the truth is, I don’t think I’ll ever escape the destruction and death I’ve seen. I’ll never be able to hide from images, the sounds, the smells. It’s too late for that.

But she was my glimpse of light, pulling me through the dark haze, and now that I’ve had a taste of what life with her could be like, I’m not sure I can give her up, especially now that she’s in obvious danger.

Thank God I left Daisy with her tonight.

Lily’s sobs are increasing as she falls apart behind the closed door. My body slumps as I turn instinctively to head back in to ease her pain.

“Kace, we got shit to finish. I’m sorry, man,” Luca expresses, placing his hand on my shoulder stopping me from breaking back into Lily’s apartment.

Clenching my eyes shut, I know he’s right. Dammit! I wish he wasn’t, but I need to find out what’s going on first.

“Kace, I know it’s got to be hard leaving her, but whoever it was in there is injured and not coming back anytime soon. She’s going to be okay. We need to report in,” Axel states breaking me away from my thoughts, his tone more sympathetic. Where Luca is a free spirit getting laid when needed and making jokes, Axel has a family away from business, people he cares about, so he’s a lot more understanding. I nod, knowing I’ll be able to return soon and watch out for her before I turn and walk away with the three members of my team who I know will always have my back.

Mrs. Henderson pops her head out of apartment four and looks at us as we walk past, her eyes turn to Eli and practically pop out of her head. I can understand why he’s a mountain of a man.

“Oh Lord, you’re massive,” she calls out.

“Thank you, ma’am,” Eli says back to her. She giggles, and her cheeks turn bright red, making her crow’s feet even more pronounced when he winks at her.

Luca chuckles, and Axel rolls his eyes. I guess there’s humor in the situation, but I don’t find it funny. My thoughts are solely on Lily and how she’s alone and falling apart after what happened, and then me dropping the bomb to top it off about my job—her head must be spinning.

We walk to the end of the hall and file down the stairs toward the waiting van. “I’ll drive, you’re too on edge, and we all know how you drive when you’re like that,” Luca quips, and I huff.

“Whatever, just get me to the boss.”

He nods as we step into the van, and he drives at what seems like a fucking snail’s pace toward the National History Museum. It’s getting close to two in the morning, so I know the museum will be closed. We’ll have to enter via the back way, which is good considering how we’re all dressed tonight.

Luca finally arrives and drives down into the underground parking lot and pulls up in our designated parking space. We file out and walk over to the elevator. Axel pushes the button three times, waits for the light to turn green, then pushes it once more.

“I should check on her,” I say, reaching for my cell.

“You should give her time to let it sink in.” Luca places his hand over mine to stop me from dialing her number.

Sighing, I grit my teeth as the ding of the elevator makes me look up to see the rusty doors open with a shudder and a loud squeak as we walk in. The doors close, and Axel opens the box on the wall pressing his thumb to the pad.

“Welcome back to The Agency, Axel.” The digital voice echoes through the elevator as we all turn around to watch the back doors slide open revealing a stainless steel, much cleaner and high-tech- looking elevator. We all take turns stepping up to the retinal scanner, which checks the unique patterns of our retina blood vessels, then we step inside. Once we’re all in, the door closes, and we start our journey up inside The Agency.

“So you actually told her?” Eli asks in his deep tenor.

I tense up knowing that this is a huge issue for the Seven.

“She won’t be a problem,” I reply.

Eli and Axel both tense the muscles in their neck and grit their teeth.

“Kace, I know you like her. But this is strange, especially for you. You’re the leader of SO7, and you, above all of us, know the importance of keeping our work covert. This puts her and us in danger. You can see that from tonight. She’s obviously already on a hit list. You need to find out why,” Axel conveys, and I nod.

“Oh, I intend to.”