Page 105 of Pretend Girlfriend

Theo: We just started playing games in the arcade. It’ll be suspicious if I ditch them now.

Theo: I know you’re feeling down because of the hiring freeze. Give me one hour, then meet me in my room and I’ll take your mind off everything.

Me: This greatly displeases me, but I think I can wait that long. I might have to start without you.

Theo: I wholeheartedly approve of this plan :-)

Me: I want you to whole-cockedly ass-prove my VAGINA.

Theo: You’re really fucking cute when your drunk.

I didn’t start without him; I ordered another drink—a tequila sunrise—and went for a walk on the beach. My ankle was still a little sore, and I took care to walk down by the surf where the sand was smooth and wouldn’t trip me up.

When I got back, only half an hour had passed. I was feeling impatient, so I went back to my room and changed into my sexiest pair of panties. Then I walked over to the next building and used the key to get into Theo’s room.

It was empty, but the maids had come recently: the bed was made, with a little towel folded into a swan resting on the pillow. Theo wouldn’t be back for another twenty minutes, so I flopped down on the couch and turned on the TV.

I really needed to get fucked good tonight. The kind of sex that hurt a little bit the next morning. I wanted to get wild. Maybe try something new. Something that would really turn Theo on.

Bored and lacking a filter, I began to snoop around in the room. Theo had hung up all of his shirts in the closet, and all of his pants were folded neatly in the dresser. That made sense for a dentist like him, but was nothing like the goofball idiot persona he had fostered among the Cozart clan. I made a mental note to tease him about it later.

His suitcase was propped open on the bench at the foot of the bed. There were a few remaining items inside: a pair of tennis shoes, an electric razor, a box of protein bars. Men and their protein. Man, strong! Man eat meat! When no meat, man get protein from whey! Oogah boogah!

Giggling to myself, I pushed the box to the side. There was a dark felt bag in the bottom of the suitcase. I didn’t want to violate his privacy too much, but my curiosity was strong and my inhibitions were down. I tugged on the strings to open the bag, then reached inside.

And pulled out a smooth black butt-plug.

I yelped and dropped it, recoiling like I’d found a tarantula inside rather than a sex toy. Cautiously, I picked it up again. It was flared at the base, then narrow, then bulged out like a small bowling pin before tapering at the top. It was about three inches long, not very large at all.

The only other object inside the bag was a tiny bottle of lube.

My immediate reaction was anger. Why did he bring this? What woman’s ass was he planning on sticking this in? Some Jamaican whore? Or worse: a random slut at the resort? Obviously we weren’t exclusive, but I couldn’t help but feel jealous.

“Wait a minute,” I said to myself. “The ass he was planning on sticking this in is mine!”

My body came alive with an excitement so powerful it shocked me. Now that would be something. I’d never been particularly interested in trying anal sex, but if there was ever a time to do something new and crazy, tonight was it. Anything to take my mind off my problems.

I giggled to myself. Was I seriously drunk enough to let a guy put things in my butt? I was eying the bottles of complimentary rum that were in every room, but decided not to get another drink. I wanted to remember what happened tonight, and one more drink might push me over the edge from drunk to sick.

I turned my attention back to the plug in my hand. It had seemed small when I first picked it up, but now that I was thinking about it inside me? It seemed so much larger than before. Still, I was excited at the thought of trying it. And I was turned on that Theo was interested in trying it with me.

There was a click, and the door to the room opened. Theo took one step inside, then did a double-take when he saw me. His eyes went from me, to the butt plug, then back to me. I gave him what I hoped was a lusty smile.

“I’ve been waiting—” I began.

Behind him came Bradyn, Austin, and two of the other groomsmen.

43

Austin

It had been a really weird day.

It started with a dream about—who else—Joanna the not-really-girlfriend of Landon’s. It wasn’t even a sex dream: we were just doing mundane stuff together, like watching TV and going to a hockey game. But it was the kind of dream that left an impression on me when I woke up, like the woman had reached out and left a bunch of fingerprints on my brain.

Then there was the parasailing. When Danicka offered it to me, she neglected to mention I’d be strapped to her son’s fake girlfriend. Yet the whole experience was kind of nice. The two of us shared a moment while flying above the perfect blue water. She both thanked me and apologized.

And the way her body felt against mine, even with our life jackets acting as barriers…

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