Page 64 of Pretend Girlfriend

Me: Yeah. I kind of quit my job last night.

Theo: Seriously? That’s awesome!

Me: Why is that awesome?

Theo: Because you told me you hated your job?

Me: I did?

Theo: It was one of the first things you mentioned on our date last week.

Me: Remembered things I said on a date? Plus five points for Theo.

Theo: Still keeping score?

Me: Always.

Theo: So you know what this means.

Me: What?

Theo: We have to pretend like we’re not having amazing sex all week in Jamaica.

Theo: Which might be hard, because we WILL be having amazing sex all week in Jamaica!

Me: That sounds delightful.

Theo: Right? I especially like the part where we have sex all week.

Me: But we do need to keep a low profile. If it’s a small resort, it might be hard to be discreet.

Theo: Right. All jokes aside, maintaining your secret is the most important thing. You think you’re up to being Landon’s fake girlfriend for an entire week? Around the clock?

Me: We’ll see!

“I can’t believe you’re coming!” Marisa said when I got to the airport. “I’m so excited.”

“Me too!” I said.

Austin was standing by the window at the gate, wearing a pair of hangover sunglasses. When I glared in his direction, he gave me a casual salute in response.

“I need to find a way to get back at Austin,” I whispered to Landon. “What do you think about making an anonymous tip to Homeland Security, telling them that he’s planning on doing a nine-eleven?”

Landon sputtered a laugh. “I’m all for getting some revenge, but I don’t think that’s a proportionate response.”

“Fine,” I muttered. “You’re no fun.”

“Yes, dear,” he replied sweetly.

“Do you mind if I have the window seat?” I asked. “I want to lean against it and sleep during the flight. I’m exhausted.”

“Whatever you want, honey.”

“That’s starting to get annoying.”

“Yes, dear.”

I elbowed him in the ribs.

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