Page 5 of Blinded By Love

She has this power over me that I can never control and I don’t know how to stop how I feel whenever she does this.

It hurts, and I know she loves me and cares for me but she has a hard-on for respect and being some sort of dominant over anything regarding me.

We fight a lot over who has control.

“I have so much potential but you don’t even see that. You never liked my writing because you never thought I was able to make something of it. I am an adult. I have been for more than a year and you still can’t let me go? You still can’t bear the thought of me leaving and you not being able to control every little thing I do. When will you understand that people grow the fuck up. People don’t revolve their lives around their mothers. I’ve done that for years and I’m done.”

“Calvin-”

“Calvin agrees with me. He knows I need to have a life of my own and to rip myself away from you. That’s exactly what I’m doing.”

I don’t wait to hear her reply or the criticism she gives me this time. I walk out the front door as she yells and calls me disrespectful.

Even when I get in the car and start the engine, I can’t help but look at the front door.

I wish I could see her wave goodbye with a smile on her face to show that she cares. Instead I just see the front door.

___

The drive to Arizona took less than six hours. I’m tired, hungry, and just want to forget all of the things in my car and go to sleep, even if it’s on the couch.

When I walk inside the house I hear the sink in the kitchen running as I turn the corner and see Calvin washing the dishes. I look at the stove and see that he made chicken parm, my favorite.

Usually he isn’t this nice but I made a deal with him saying that if he makes me chicken parm then I would buy him coffee tomorrow when I run errands. He loves his Mocha Frappe.

“I didn’t actually think you would make it.” I put my bags on the floor.

“Well I was promised coffee. I didn’t make you a plate because I’m nice.”

I smile and shake my head at him. “I don’t care. I’m hungry and tired.” I walk inside the kitchen and go to the chicken parm.

“I already set up a mattress for you in your room. You said your bed isn’t coming until Friday, right?”

“Yea. Tomorrow I’m going to an interview at this cafe and after that I am going to get some stuff for my room and unpack.”

“You need help getting your stuff from the car?”

“No. I’ll get it tomorrow morning. I just brought in stuff for my bathroom and then some of my clothes.” I grab a fork and start digging into the chicken parm.

The first taste makes me want to moan. His chicken parm always tastes the best.

“Okay, well I have work tomorrow. Sam will come over tomorrow to see if you need help with anything.”

Sam is my uncle's best friend. I don’t know how long they have been friends with one another but they are super close. Sam and my uncle have a business together. My uncle is a graphic designer. He creates book covers, movie posters, and a shit ton of graphics. Sam runs his website and sales. They also have a business where they sell hair jewelry which is cool.

Calvin starts walking up the stairs when I say, “Goodnight, Calvin.”

“Goodnight.”

Three

Jaclyn

Yesterday was filled with getting stuff for my room. It took me two days to finish all of my errands. I also had to call the school to ask a couple of questions before coming to class.

I got a job as a server at a small diner in a plaza called No-Doze Diner. It’s like a version of Ruby’s but better and not as colorful. It’s a minimalist diner. The girl who interviewed me, Andy, basically said I would be hired but she has to double check with her grandma who owns the diner. It’s a family owned business, she said only a couple of longtime employees work there but since the summer ended they had to go back to their usual jobs as teachers.

She said I start later today which is good because I need to start getting money in to help Calvin pay for the mortgage. It was part of our agreement when I asked to live with him. I pay half of the mortgage and get to live there and basically do whatever I want, with some restrictions.

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