Page 34 of Blinded By Love

I fall to the ground and open the toilet seat before throwing everything up.

Tears start running down my face as more and more bile falls from my mouth. I whimper and shake, wanting to close my eyes.

I feel my hair being pulled away from my face and I almost imagine I’m back home with my mom holding my hair back as I would throw up.

“It’s okay. Keep going. You’re okay.” I hear someone whisper. But I feel too tired and dizzy to recognize the voice. They run their fingers along my forehead and their warm hand on my back feels so good and soothing. But I still can’t stop the bile coming out of my mouth. I wish it could all stop. I don’t know why this has to feel like I am dying. I feel like I am near death but it’s not like the low type of death where I shake uncontrollably and panic. It’s the high type, where I feel tired and dizzy. “You’re okay, Jaclyn. I’m here.”

And that’s the last thing I hear before everything goes blank.

Sixteen

Hayden

As Jaclyn keeps nodding off, my heart races.

I can’t help but feel anxiety rush through my veins as I hold her head up.

“Jaclyn, come on. Wake up, princess. Let me see those eyes,” I whisper in her ear, moving her hair out of her face. She has some throw up on her chin that I wipe with a tissue. Jaclyn has her eyes closed and her breathing is steady. I take her wings off and throw them behind me. “Wake up Jaclyn. Come on. Wake up.” My eyes go to the patch on her arm and I can’t help but wonder if that thing has to do with why she is acting like this.

I saw her drink a few shots and Chris told me the girls took shots at the apartment but I didn’t think she was wasted to the point where she faints.

I grab Jaclyn and pull her into my arms, holding her from under her knees and arms. I ignore the way my heart beats against my chest rapidly from her being so close to me.

I get out of the restroom and apologize to the guy in line. I saw Jaclyn run past him, stumbling into the bathroom as people in line cussed her out.

I walk towards Kayden since he is the only one I see left in the kitchen. Kayden’s eyes go to Jaclyn in my arms and he furrows his eyebrows.

“What happened?” he says, walking up to me.

“She fainted. I need to take her to the hospital. Tell Chris and Natalia that I left with her.”

“They are trying to look for her right now. Natalia saw her leave and then went to find Chris,” Kayden says, his eyes going back down to Jaclyn, looking worried about her.

“Just tell them I took her,” I say before leaving, not waiting to hear his reply.

I walk out of the house, passing everyone who is stumbling in the hallways. When I get to my car that’s parked in the front, I unlock the door and open the passenger door, slipping Jaclyn in. I go to the back of the car and grab a hoodie to throw on her. I buckle her seatbelt before slipping inside the driver side of the car. I pull out of the driveway and drive off.

My eyes keep going to Jaclyn as I speed to the hospital. Her breaths are steady but I can’t help but feel fucking worried. The way she heaved in the toilet reminded me of my mother.

The way I had to take care of her when I was only a child even though she was meant to take care of me.

My hands tighten around the wheel and the speed of the car picks up.

I don’t look at Jaclyn at all during the rest of the ride to the hospital. I park right in the front and turn off the car. I get to Jaclyn’s side and take her in my arms. She rests her head against my chest, snuggling into me like a child snuggles into a pillow. I hate the way she feels so right and good in my arms. It feels like she belongs there.

It’s hard to think about wanting to ruin her when she looks so innocent in my arms, sleeping as if I’m not the devil out to destroy her.

“Something’s wrong with her,” I say, right when I get to the front desk, ignoring the overwhelming thoughts in my head.

The nurse looks up from her computer and her eyes go to Jaclyn after she finishes looking at me.

“What happened?”

“She started throwing up and then she just fainted.”

“Did she have anything to drink tonight?” she asks, typing on her computer.

It’s not that busy tonight in the ER, thank god.

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