Page 159 of The Sidekick

“You don’t even have little crumbs in your bed, do you?” Max teases.

I glare at him. “No. I’m not a heathen.”

“You’re out, Max,” Satan laughs.

“I like a bedtime snack!” He protests loudly.

“You get whatever it is everywhere, babe.”

“Whatever,” he pouts.

The woman flings the sheets around and rolls around in them like she’s marking her territory. I’ve never seen anything like this. She fluffs pillows and tosses them everywhere. Then her clothes get placed in strategic spots that make no sense to me. The dress goes halfway across the room with a toss, and she drops the bra in the doorway.

“What is she doing? Nesting?” I tilt my head as if the different angle could help me figure it out.

Max laughs as Satan shakes his head. “She’s setting someone up. But who?”

“Oh shit,” Max snaps his fingers and agrees. “Just like Monica. She tried to make it look like she was sleeping with Trevor so I would get pissed and leave him. She didn’t realize we actually spoke to each other like adults. Sometimes at least.”

“You guys let this keep on happening? I would have started laying traps everywhere,” I shake my head. I’m sure there are a lot of stories they could tell me.

“Bear traps?” Max scoffs.

“Aluminum can pyramid traps? They’re so loud when they fall. Tripwires. That kind of thing.”

They both stare at me in surprise.

“You guys have no imagination,” I shake my head with a heavy sigh. “If I broke in some place and set off a whole tower of empty soda cans, do you know how embarrassing that would be? Now imagine I’m trying to be all sexy and end up falling on a tripwire. How bold would you have to be to get up and keep going after that? Oh! She’s on the move!”

She’s all sweaty and out of breath now as she saunters towards the stairs. I lost track of the twins, but they’re both talking at the base of the stairs. I expand the stair camera, the base of the stairs camera, and an aerial view from the gaudy chandelier, sending the rest of the cams to thumbnail size.

“You’re scary good at this,” Max comments as if he’s impressed.

“I watched Andi’s back for seven months. It’s mostly muscle memory now. I also know how to click out of this super quick and cry myself to sleep because what has been seen cannot be unseen,” I shudder with revulsion.

“Can I say gross this time?” Satan’s lip curls with disgust. I nod, patting his shoulder in sympathy before I realize what I’m doing and snatch my hand back.

The woman slowly steps down, drawing their attention. Felix does a double take and Blaze gapes at her. She does some kind of breast-rubbing move that makes me cringe for her.

“Sweetie, no. Too much.”

“Are you rating her performance?” Max starts laughing at my horrified expression.

“She’s going to fall in those heels if she’s not careful.” I’m holding my breath as I watch her wobble a little.

Satan starts laughing, and Max gets louder.

“I would have to be asked to do this with three months of prep time just to practice walking in heels,” I shake my head. “On stairs? I admire the bravery this would take. Could you imagine trying this on someone?”

“No, Trev would fall in those heels,” Max starts guffawing while Satan grins.

Blaze starts up the staircase with some kind of slow, sleazy walk, talking the whole way. When he gets two steps away from her, he leans in and licks across her chest.

“You- I can’t even think of what to call you,” I shout at the computer.

He eases her onto the steps, and my stomach tries to revolt.

I can’t watch this. I refuse to watch them treat Shade as if he doesn’t exist one more dang time!

---