Page 101 of Forever and Other Lies

She had set the basket on the island and stared at it, peering inside the clear cellophane.

“Why shampoo? And so many? Does my hair smell?”

“Yep,” he answered, laughing at her sudden frown.

“It never smells the same, and it’s driving me nuts,” he clarified. “You need to pick a scent and stick to it.”

“I do?”

“Yes, you do. You need to commit.”

“This isn’t about shampoo?” Her brow furrowed.

No! It wasn’t about shampoo! “It’s about your inability to commit.”

Her eyes widened. “My inability to commit?”

Chapter 52

“My inability to commit!” Jayna’s mouth dropped open as she repeated the words a second time. He didn’t just say that! “You’ve got to be kidding me! I’m getting a commitment lecture from Two-Date Brennan?”

“Is it so far-fetched?”

“Yeah!” she scoffed. “What are you really doing here, Derek?”

He propped a hip against the counter and scrubbed a hand over his face. “I messed up, Jayna. I should never have walked out of your hospital room like that. I guess I was just frightened.”

“Frightened of what, Derek?” she asked. He’d faced down Sonny, saved her life, but admitting that he had feelings was what frightened him? “Are you frightened of actually feeling something?”

“No, I was afraid of messing things up with you.”

“So, instead of taking a chance, you just gave up?”

He shrugged. “I didn’t want to disappoint you. I didn’t want you to realize that I’m not a guy worth your time.”

“Well, congratulations. You succeeded!” Jayna let the sarcasm flow. “I needed you, Derek. I thought I was going to die. Then you showed up, and I began to believe that you really did care about me.”

Her chest rose and fell. “I told you that I love you. And what did you say back?”

Again, he shrugged.

“You said,” her lips quivered, “that I didn’t know what love is, only how to avoid it.”

He nodded. “Jayna, all I ever do is disappoint people who love me. I’m not a guy worth loving.”

“That’s a cop-out,” she sniped.

“What can I say, I acted like my idiot self yet again.”

She stared at him, waiting for something—anything—to show that he could be a decent guy, a dependable guy. She wished that she could believe in him. “Do you have any idea what it felt like when you walked out of my hospital room? I put myself out there yet again. I offered you my heart a second time, and you didn’t want it.”

“I did want it. I was…” He threw his hands up in the air.

“You were frightened?” she supplied for him. “And you’re not now? You’ve warmed up your cold feet?”

He nodded.

“I don’t know that I can trust you.” Jayna shook her head. “I’m going to need something more substantial than just your word. Because your word means nothing to me.”

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