Page 63 of Noah

"Five. But yes, it's not a great record. I don't even know what Brody sees in me."

"We've been through this already," Owen said. "You're a great catch."

I shook my head. "I don't know how to be a good boyfriend. I told him yesterday that I don't love him. I could have handled it better."

"Wait!" Ethan put his hands up. "Did Brody tell you he loves you?"

"No. No. Nothing like that. A kid at the centre saw the way we were looking at each other. Made a comment about us loving one another. I set him straight. I may have been curt."

"You hurt Brody's feelings?" Liam patted me on the back. "Is that what happened?"

I nodded. "See. Shitty boyfriend." I waved my hand. "Who's next?"

Ethan crossed his arms. "We're trying out some new pastries at the shop. A beautiful cream puff and a nice baklava. So far sales have been good."

"And the dreamy Daniel," Owen said. "How's it going with him?"

Ethan shrugged. "He stopped coming in."

I caught Ethan's eye. "I'm sorry. You had high hopes for that one."

"A good man escaped," Ethan replied and smiled. "Must be losing my touch."

"Never." Owen reached over and squeezed Ethan's hand. "Maybe he's straight."

"Or married," Liam offered. "Or both."

"I don't care," Ethan said. "He's gone … so, whatever."

I hated seeing Ethan distraught. He was trying to cover it up by flashing his smile around, but none of us were falling for it. He'd really liked this guy.

"Maybe he's away on business," I said, plucking reasons for the guy's disappearance from the air. "Maybe he's sick or he has a friend or family member who needs him."

"Noah, stop," Ethan said. "I'm all right."

None of us mentioned it again. Instead, Owen brought up an app he was using to order groceries and other items. It was a delivery service that shopped for you at quite a few major stores up and down the South Island. He seemed excited. We listened.

The group wound down early. The initial discussion bomb that Liam had set off had worn us all out. Funny thing about getting older. Any kind of stress made you tired.

I went to my office to finish a few things. Maddy was closing tonight. I could leave as soon as I was done. My half-finished, abandoned dinner was still sitting on the desk.

I took it down to the kitchen after finishing some paperwork and then left for the night. It was just past eleven, but I was exhausted. I looked at my phone. I had sent Brody a hey, handsome message hours ago and he hadn't answered. I debated sending him another. Maybe he had missed the first one. Maybe he just needed his phone to ding again to notice both messages.

I spiralled.

Despite the sweet and seductive kiss he'd given me afterward, maybe me blurting out aggressively that I didn't love him had upset Brody more than he had let on.

I was a shitty boyfriend.

I stuffed my phone back in my pocket.

Tomorrow was Monday.

My answer would come in the form of him either showing up or not.

I jammed my hand into my hair and propped up my head on the desk. For the first week ever, the pub had lost money. I could blame it on the fact it was the slow season, or I could give my head a shake and admit the fact that it was my fault. There was no denying, I sucked at this.

I typed a few things into the search field on my computer and found myself on the Queen's University website. I scanned through the list of classes for the business law degree. I had completed two years of study before I switched to business management at a different university.